Of Kisses and Kunai
by Kakashis-First-Kiss
Summary: When Itachi first makes his appearance and Kakashi, Kurenai, and Asuma fight him, they lose miserably. But now that Asuma has taken Kakashi to the hospital, Kurenai is left with Itachi. Who wins the RomeoJuliet battle? ItaKuren, ItaKaka, AsuKuren
1. Chapter 1

Kurenai ducked Itachi's next swing. She was beginning to get annoyed with the way the battle was going, and she had been in a bad mood ever since the day began. Sighing as she kicked out, she tried a genjutsu on the Uchiha.

"Tree Bind Death!"

A tree sprang up behind Itachi. Branches fanned out and wrapped around him, swiftly capturing Sasuke's older brother. Kurenai squished into the tree trunk. Itachi activated a different part of his Sharingan and looked up. _Come out, come out, from wherever you are hiding…little rat._

Kurenai resurfaced a second later, above Itachi, brandishing a kunai.

"Die, freak!"

She moved to plunge the kunai down into Itachi's neck-

And a tree branch caught her hand.

"Huh?"

Kurenai looked down in shock. Her own jutsu now held her prisoner, and Itachi was standing in front of her, smirking.

"It's a reversal jutsu," Itachi said, "that turns the jutsu upon its user, thus freeing the Sharingan user from it."

"Why you little-"

"Oh, shut up."

Itachi directed a branch to cover Kurenai's mouth as the jounin struggled to release herself. _Man, I walked right into that one…_

Itachi stepped forward, that damnable smirk never leaving his lips. "Now that you're taken care of, I think I'll move on to…more important things." Itachi turned, staring in Kakashi's direction. Kurenai's eyes widened. _No! Not Kakashi! Don't you dare, you son of a bitch!_

Itachi turned and walked towards Kakashi, who was aiding Asuma in disposing of Itachi's partner, Kisame. The swordsman was having trouble fending them both off at the same time, but he was managing. "Kisame!" Itachi yelled. "I got her."

Kakashi whirled around-

Falling right into Itachi's trap.

Itachi seized Kakashi's wrists, activating his Mangekyou Sharingan at the same time. He stared into Kakashi's eyes, trying to drag him down into Tsukiyomi. Kakashi fought him viciously; he couldn't leave Kurenai, he just couldn't! Itachi bore down harder, and Kakashi was beginning to feel the strain. _I'm not done yet!_

Kurenai watched in shock as a deadly blue aura began to glow around Kakashi, crackling energy and chakra. Itachi barely looked surprised.

"So that's where Sasuke learned his jutsu," he murmured, still trying to pull Kakashi down into Tsukiyomi. "Too bad you won't be able to teach him for a while."

_Kakashi!! No!!!_

Kakashi screamed in pain, and Kurenai flinched and turned away as a loud snap resounded through the air. The Chidori crackling around both of Kakashi's hands slowly died off as the jounin collapsed to the ground. "Not happening," Itachi growled, and heaved Kakashi's limp body back up.

"Mangekyou Sharingan!"

Kakashi didn't bother to fight anymore. He merely went limp in Itachi's arms, and let the Tsukiyomi take over.

OOOOOOOOO

Kurenai was screaming and screaming, trying desperately to get to Kakashi. She knew what Itachi would do him, and there was no way she was letting it happen!

"Kurenai, it's no use!"

Asuma shouted over the clang of metal as he and Kisame exchanged blows. Asuma focused chakra through his trench knives, using it to cut Kisame more than Kisame was aware of. "Even if you could get to him, you can't drag him out of that illusion! If you did, he'd be killed!"

Kurenai looked as Asuma in shock. _No…no. I can't let Itachi do this!!_

Kurenai felt chakra lacing its way through her body, tingling down her spine, looping through her veins, and threading over her senses. _Not ever…he gave up his own life for me, and I won't let this…freak take him away from me!! _The tree branches began to slowly recede, against everyone's will but Kurenai's. _I can't be the weakest of the team anymore: the first one to run into trouble the first one to fall, the first blood falling from me-! Not anymore, no! _Kurenai slammed her fists into the tree trunk, breaking the jutsu. The tree exploded outwards, spraying everyone with sap and tree guts. Kurenai looked up from her newly formed hand sign, red eyes blazing with fury. _Not ever again…am I going to sit around and be the one who has to be protected and saved every time! I am not going to be pushed around by this jerk!!_ Kurenai glanced at Itachi. _He should be just about done by now…_

"Now to take my revenge!!'

OOOOOOOOO

Kakashi woke up to a blood red sky.

Wooden splinters stabbed at his back, and metal dug into his wrists. The red overhead was harsh, and the black clouds stood out against the blood-stained moon. Kakashi tried to move, but only felt stinging pain in his wrists and ankles. Blood soaked through his clothes, and the lacerations in his wrists and ankles ached and stung with every movement of his body. Kakashi looked down; he knew what was coming next.

Itachi stood beneath him, katana in hand.

"In the world of Tsukiyomi, I control everything. Space, time, even your movements. I can even still your heartbeat if I wish. And if I want to punish you, so be it. You'll be in _hell_."

Kakashi whimpered as the blade slid into his side, and passed out from the pain.

OOOOOOOOO

"No, Asuma," Kurenai hissed as the tree innards flew. "I can't halt the jutsu…but Itachi can."

"He'll be in as much pain as if he went the full three days and Itachi will still have the Mangekyou to use on us! Kurenai, please, don't try anything!"

A scream broke the air as if cut by a knife, and Kakashi crumpled to the ground, shaking and ready to faint. Kurenai gasped and dashed to Kakashi's side. Asuma sighed and kicked Kisame into the air, hurling a kunai after him. "Road kill."

The kunai hit square, and Kisame was down for the count, struck in the neck. Asuma slid the blades off his knuckles and stuck them in his kunai pouch. "He took him for the whole three days."

He slowly walked over to where Kurenai was lifting Kakashi into her arms. "Asuma," she whispered. "Take him to a medical squad immediately. I'll finish off this one."

Asuma started. "What? You can't handle him alone!"

"Says who?" Kurenai shot back. Fire burned in her eyes, rising with rage and fury at what had been done to her friend. Blood ran down Kakashi's sides and wrists from where Itachi had fought to keep him still while the Tsukiyomi was in use. Now, it stained Kurenai's hands a warm, sticky red, and it was like pouring gasoline on fire. Bruises peppered Kakashi's body, though they were not as visible, as most of them were underneath Kakashi's clothing. Kurenai knew from the cracks she had heard earlier that Itachi had broken both of Kakashi's wrists. "Take Kakashi now or he'll die!"

Asuma slowly exhaled. "All right." The elder jounin slid his hands under Kakashi's limp body and carefully picked up the younger, wounded jounin. "It's okay, you're safe."

Kakashi barely shifted.

"Asuma, he's out cold. It doesn't matter anymore. Take him away from here, _now_!"

Asuma nodded and jumped into the air, carrying Kakashi away. Kurenai turned to Itachi, eyes flaming.

"Now…" she growled, fitting her hands into the sign of the tiger. "Time to heat things up!"

The Sharingan began to turn over Itachi's eyes. "Bring it on, then."

Kurenai began to activate the jutsu, preparing to strike. "By the time I'm finished with you, you're gonna wish you were never born, Uchiha!"

Itachi stepped forward. "Oh, no I'm not. See, in the Akatsuki, it's considered a dishonor to be beaten by the opposite gender."

"Man, you're really gonna need doton after this then," Kurenai taunted, a wicked grin spreading over her face. "You are going to be so humiliated, you are going to be sinking into the ground with shame with the beating I'm about to give you!"

"Do they consider the same as shameful, Yuuhi?" Itachi asked wickedly.

"Well, of course," Kurenai said tartly. "But I know doton."  
"And you know what _I _know?" Itachi said sarcastically. "That you're annoying!"

"You know, on second thought, I probably won't be needing that doton," Kurenai mused. "I'll be pulverizing you."

"Then enough with the talk, and do something!"

Kurenai's smirk broadened. "Okay, but you asked for it!"

Kurenai's hands began to flash in signs Itachi could barely follow even with his Sharingan. The Sharingan was a bit tired from using the Mangekyou so extensively on Kakashi, and Itachi was in no mood to continue this any further. _Yuuhi pest, _he thought. _I'll put you in your place right now!_

Itachi began copying Kurenai's jutsu, half-surprised at the length. Kurenai had been making the signs for as long as they had been talking…

"Air Style: Deadly Cherry Blossom Illusion!!"

Itachi copied it in an instant, and within seconds, cherry blossoms were suffocating Kurenai. The only problem was-Kurenai knew how to get out of the illusion, while Itachi didn't. And within the moment, Kurenai had propelled herself from the jutsu, leaving Itachi to battle it out with the flowers.

_This sucks. So much dick._

Itachi sighed, and tried a basic release. It seemed to weaken the jutsu a bit, but not by much. Itachi was now running short on breath, and he needed to breath. He formed the tiger sign, trying a substitution to release himself.

Surprisingly, it worked. The cherry blossoms were now attacking a log.

Kurenai's eyes widened. _How…? A mere substitution shouldn't work on the blossoms, it just can't! _Kurenai turned around, looking for Itachi. _If he substituted, he should be somewhere in the trees, which would be-_

"Here."

Kurenai gasped and turned around-

A second too late.

Itachi struck the back of her neck, knocking her down into the water. As she lost consciousness, Kurenai couldn't help but wondering if Asuma had gotten Kakashi safely away.

OOOOOOOOO

Itachi sighed. _Finally. _That Yuuhi pest had been knocked flat, and he was happy about it. Itachi bent down and dragged the body to the edge of the water. _Still alive…? _He pressed his fingers to the side of her neck, searching for a pulse. It was there- strong and regular. Itachi sighed. _One more rat still to deal with. _Itachi grabbed the woman's body and turned her onto er back, trying to see what she had left. She might be worth a bit of trouble…

She was pretty, for one thing. Her black hair was attractively messy, falling into her face at points to perfectly frame her red eyes. Her eyes themselves were closed, but Itachi had seen the beauty of them already. Now, her thick black eyelashes rested against her pale, white skin, so white it reflected a bit of the sunlight. Her features were slightly widely spaced, but it was angled just so that nothing looked out of proportion. Itachi smiled. _She'll be fun to play with…_He realized that she might be trouble as well. But then again, anything this beautiful _had_ to come at a price.

He had learned that the hard way with Kakashi.

He was simply stunning in pain, so one night Itachi had taken advantage of him and fulfilled his own satanic pleasures. Kakashi had fought him so hard, and that night Itachi lost more blood than he ever had in his entire life. But still…the price had been paid, and he had been rewarded well. He had never touched Kakashi again, but he could see the pure fear in the jounin's eyes whenever he made an appearance. And he was praying this Yuuhi would not be the same.

As Itachi watched her, he realized that he wanted her. She was perfect- and he hadn't seen anything this beautiful in a long time. Not since Kakashi, in fact. And…she might be worth Itachi's trouble.

If she were, it would be a first for Itachi.

Itachi slid his hands under Kurenai's body, carefully lifting her across his shoulders. He held her by the wrists and ankles, trying to keep her from falling. This could even be fun…

OOOOOOOOO

Kurenai woke up upside down.

Her first inclination was to kick whoever was holding her, and to try to punch their lights out. But then, as she was roughly dumped to the ground, she saw whom she was up against.

Uchiha Itachi.

"Aw man," Itachi muttered, sticking his foot into her side. "I drag you all the way down here, and _now_ you wake up. Fantastic, Yuuhi. Fantastic."

Kurenai smirked. "Guess you'll have to carry me all the way back up, then."

Itachi dug his foot into her side, producing a yelp…and a twisted ankle.

Itachi groaned, sinking to the stone floor as he clutched at his ankle. "You wench…! Now I have to fuck you down here!"

"No, you don't," Kurenai said tartly, standing up. "I have to kick _you."_

The Itachi on the ground smirked-

And disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

Kurenai started. _A clone?!_

Itachi was behind her now, and he threw his arms around hers, pinning them to her sides. Kurenai, frustrated with the entire affair, kicked Itachi's shin in exasperation. Itachi simply lifted his foot out of the way and wrestled Kurenai to the ground, turning her onto her back.

"You fight like Kakashi."

"Is that a complement?"

Itachi smiled. "Yes."

"You raped him, too?"

"What's that supposed to mean, _too_?"

"You know what I mean."

"No I don't."

"Don't play stupid with me."

Itachi lowered his head. Kurenai could feel warm breath flowing over her face as Itachi whispered, "You do know what happened to them, right?"

Kurenai shook her head, curiosity awakened. She sat up, dumping Itachi to the side, and cocked her head innocently, black hair falling to the side in a mess of black half-curls. "What?"

Itachi chuckled. "You're so innocent," he murmured, placing his hand in her hair. It was surprisingly soft for appearance, and it felt like it was pampered.

"Pampered like yours," Kurenai said, flipping her hair back over her shoulder.

"Stop," Itachi said quietly. "Everyone teases me about that."

"Then I'll tease you more," Kurenai said, sliding back.

"Please don't."

"Girly man."

"Shut up."

"Girly boy."

Itachi clamped his hand over Kurenai's mouth in annoyance. "You certainly know how to try me."

Kurenai leaned back, trying to escape Itachi's grip. But Itachi slid his other hand behind Kurenai's head, holding her close to him. "Shut up."

Kurenai sighed and stuck out her tongue, trying to lick Itachi's hand. "Eeeeewwwwwwww…" Itachi muttered. "Girls really shouldn't slobber on guys."

_Says who, you flippin' bastard?!_

Itachi still had his hand over her mouth. Kurenai's jaws opened, and she nipped at the skin on Itachi's palm. Itachi sighed. "Bite me again, and I swear I will-"

Another nip brought Itachi's attention back to Kurenai. "I thought I told you not to bite me again."

Kurenai was kneeling down in front of Itachi now, and Itachi realized that she was now in a better position to make a move. "Do _not _bite me!"

_Get your filthy hands off my mouth!_

Kurenai smiled as she bit Itachi again, much harder this time. Itachi sighed and withdrew his hand. "Fine; you win."

"Thank you."

Itachi sighed again as he surveyed the bites on his palm. They were bleeding fairly badly for bites. "You better not have rabies."

Kurenai snapped her jaws again and spat.

Itachi stuck out his tongue. "Okay then: my turn to bite you." He leaped forward, still using his other hand to hold Kurenai's head-

-and kissed her.

**A/N: I will continue this, but I want to know what you think first. Soooo…review!!! I will not put up the next chapter until you review! Thanks, and let me know what you think!**


	2. Chapter 2

Kurenai was shocked at Itachi's behavior. She yanked backwards and snapped her teeth, threatening to nip him again. Itachi smiled and slid back.

"Kurenai…" he murmured, holding her face in his hands. "You taste good."

"Is that a compliment?" Kurenai asked, feeling Itachi's hand fisted in her hair. Itachi smiled and licked his lips.

"Indeed it is," he said, releasing her. Kurenai immediately scooted back, trying to avoid another show of intimacy from Itachi.

"I'm not kissing you again, if that's what you want," Itachi said, trying to hide his disappointment. "Come on; I'll clean you up."

Kurenai hesitated. "This better not be a trick of some sort," she threatened. "Or I swear, I will hurt you so bad-"

"Yeah, yeah," Itachi said. "Kakashi said he was going to demolish me and he wound up in a coma for a week. Asuma said he was going to pummel me into the ground, and he wound up road kill. Tsunade said-"

"Point taken," Kurenai mumbled. "But I will leave a mark if this is more crap from you!"

Itachi sighed and rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah. Whatever, Mother."

Kurenai reached down and promptly smacked Itachi over the head.

"Okay, that I let you do," he confessed, standing up.

Kurenai mimicked Itachi, rolling her eyes. "Yeah, yeah, whatever."

"Let's go, brat," Itachi said, standing up. "You want to get clean, don't you?"

"Sure, I want to be clean, but sex will only get me dirtier, right?"

"Wh-what are you trying to say-?"

Kurenai flipped off Itachi and proceeded to Itachi's bedroom.

OOOOOOOOO

Itachi waited, watching TV with no particular interest at all while Kurenai showered. "Boring…is that a movie…? Oh, no this is the porn channel…Boring…boring…boring…Apollo 13…boring…boring…Desperate Housewives…Oh, let's watch that!"

"Don't," Kurenai said dryly, walking out of the bathroom. Her hair was dripping wet, and the water was pooling on the rug. Itachi sighed and turned off the TV.

"You're going to have to go with your own lingerie, since I don't wear thongs or any female things like that. I've got a shirt and some pants that might work, though."

"Fine," Kurenai said, finding her clothes. "By the way, we use the same shampoo."

"What?!"

"Yeah, shameful for a man, I know."

"Shut up."

"Why should I?"

"Because I'm telling you to."

"What are you gonna do, bite me?"

"Yes! No…Aw, screw it!!"

"You're annoying, you know that?"

"I know; I get it from my mom."

"Shut up!!"

"Oh, I'm scared!"

"You should be!"

Itachi made a face and turned away. "I'm not putting up with any crap from you."

"I've already bitten you three, four times by now," Kurenai snapped waspishly.

"And I think we all know who wears the thong in this relationship, right?"

"Right; me!"

"You are a disgrace!"

"To men, yes!"

Kurenai found a brush lying in the corner of the dresser and began brushing out her hair. "That's mine!" Itachi cried.

"Tough noodles with a female," Kurenai said unrepentantly. "You take a female prisoner and offer to let her clean up in your room, you take what you get."

"I really hate you."

"I know you do."

Kurenai took her underwear and other undergarments back into the bathroom to change. The door slammed shut, and Itachi began flipping through the channels again.

The apartment door slammed.

Itachi turned slightly, simply to see who it was. His roommate, Kisame, walked in, looking absolutely spent. He dumped Samehada in the closet just to the left of the door and proceeded to collapse on the couch, landing on Itachi's legs.

Itachi gave him a horrendous stare.

"Get up. Now."

"I'm too tired to mooooooove," Kisame whined. Itachi bucked his legs irritably, trying to get Kisame up. The missing-nin was unceremoniously dumped to the floor, and Itachi kicked him in the head.

"Stoooooooop," Kisame moaned. Itachi cocked a leg and kicked him soundly again. "Bitch," Kisame mumbled, reclining against the front of the couch.

"Move it, hell shit!" Itachi shouted, thumping Kisame in the skull. The former Mist nin made a face and slithered over to the bathroom. "Who's in there?" he asked, perplexed.

"Kurenai," Itachi said, settling on the pillows. Kisame's eyes widened.

"You're letting your prisoner clean herself up? In _your_ bathroom?!"

"Yup," Itachi said matter-of-factly. "Got a problem with that?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact, I do," Kisame said tartly.

"Deal with it," Itachi said lazily, just as Kurenai waltzed out of the bathroom, covered only with a bra and a tiny pair of underwear that looked like the bottom of a string bikini to Kisame. His eyes nearly popped out of his skull and they followed her out of the bathroom.

"Kisame, no ideas," Itachi said lazily, tossing a pair of pants and a shirt to Kurenai. "She's mine."

"I'm no one's," the jounin bit back, yanking on the pants. "These are huge," she muttered, pulling up the pants. "You have one huge ass," she complained.

"Suck it up and deal," Itachi said, throwing the TV remote onto the coffee table in front of him.

"They really need to make these things for women," Kurenai continued as she pulled the shirt over her head. She saw a hair tie lying on the dresser next to the hairbrush she had found and tied the shirt in the back. Itachi could clearly see the outline of her form now, and Kurenai seemed much more comfortable. She looked around and, spotting the roll of bandages on the vanity in the bathroom, she stuck her hand in the door, grabbed the bandages and began winding them around her lower legs. Itachi simply stared, then sighed.

"Girls," he mumbled, standing up. "Always have to look perfect."

"With your hair?" Kurenai asked disparagingly. "You've got hair as pampered as mine!"

"Problem…?"

Kurenai rolled her eyes. "Figure it out, fuzz-for-brains."

Itachi sighed. "When I am finished with you, you won't be able to feel your ass for a week!"

"Keep dreaming," Kurenai said flippantly. "It might actually come true in one of my illusions!"

Itachi grumbled something horrible about "takes after her Hokage" and "whore" under his breath, then turned off the TV and stood up.

"How would you feel about joining us?"

Kurenai was shocked. "What ever gave you that idea?!"

Itachi shrugged. "Your boyfriend is Asuma right..? Sarutobi Asuma…one of the Elite Twelve…"

Kurenai's eyes narrowed. "What's he got to do with anything?"

"He'll probably come for you, and if you want him to leave alive, you owe me a couple favors."

"You…make…me…sick!"

"I know," Itachi said with a sarcastic shrug. "I get it from him."

Kisame looked up from the floor. "Hey! I've never told you what a ho you are!"

"That's because you're small and insignificant, because teaming up with me was your idea, and because I will pummel you if you do."

Kisame gulped and scooted backwards across the rug. "Okay-three very good reasons-I'm going now…"

Itachi sighed and turned around. Kurenai looked over his shoulder at the retreating Kisame, who was making horrible faces at Itachi's back.

"Is he okay?" she asked slowly. Itachi sighed again.

"I ask myself that question every day."

OOOOOOOOO

"_Uchiha Itachi!!"_

Itachi threw a kunai at the door. "Exploding tag."

"What a load of bull-"

The tag exploded, and Kurenai had to smile at the shout of surprise from behind the door. "You've got to be kidding me."

Itachi shook his head. "He's a moron."

Kurenai exhaled slowly and ran a hand through her hair. Three days in this hellhole and already she was used to life in the Akatsuki. "Should I let him in?"

"I blew down the door, smart one."

"It's not crumbling."

"Tough luck for whatever sucker's out there."

"What if I told you it was your leader?"

"What if I told you to stop lying?"

Kurenai locked eyes with Itachi, and Itachi could have sworn sparks jumped between the two of them. Finally, Itachi sighed heavily and went to the door. Peeking through the massive hole he had just blown, he snorted.

"I will never know how you do that."

Kurenai shrugged and took Itachi's place on the couch. "I'm special that way."

Itachi raised a hand and muttered something Kurenai couldn't catch. The door immediately repaired itself, and Itachi slowly opened it. "Whoops."

"Where's Yuuhi Kurenai?" the leader muttered, brushing ash off of his cloak. Itachi wordlessly pointed to Kurenai, who was playing with a handfull of kunai.

"You want something?" she asked, looking up at the sound of her name.

"As a matter of fact, I do," he said, pacing swiftly towards her. Kurenai's grip on the kunai shifted, and she slowly stood up and stepped away from the couch. "What do you want?"

"You know a guy named Sarutobi Asuma?"

Kurenai turned her head slightly to the side, staring at the leader through a curtain of black hair. "Why do you need to know?"

"Just curious," he said dismissively. "I mean, his life isn't really important, now is it?"

Kurenai's eyes widened. "You wouldn't dare."

"We would," the leader threatened, moving closer. Kurenai stared at the shock of orange hair sticking straight up in a series of spikes.

"Why would you go after Asuma?"

"He's your boyfriend. Reason enough for me."

Kurenai's eyes narrowed to cat-like slits. "There's more."

A smirk played across the leader's lips. "Of course there is, sweet little tiger."

Kurenai's kunai ascended to a dangerous height. "You have ten seconds before I flatten you."

"Itachi, do you normally allow her to mouth off this much?" the leader asked, feigning shock. "Well, I never!"

Itachi shrugged. "She's not killing anybody and she's not doing any harm. Why not?"

"One…two…"

The leader gave an exaggerated sigh and turned back to her. "Okay, little lady. Since you're so vehement about this, I'll let you know the inside scoop."

"Three…_four…!"_

"He's a jinchuuriki."

**A/N: Sorry this is a little short. I will be updating every week or so, because I have a couple other stories going as well. So…this will be updated, but it might take a while. And for those of you wondering, the leader of the Akatsuki was never named, at least to my knowledge. So if anyone knows his name, I'd love to know. Thanks, and enjoy the fic!!!**


	3. Chapter 3

Kurenai's eyes widened in shock. "Asuma? A jinchuuriki? There's no way-"

"Yes, there is, little lady," the leader said hardly. "Because he is."

"How do you know, bitch?"

"Stick to Kakuza," the leader said, shrugging off Kurenai's filthy mouth. "And let's just say I have my sources."

Kurenai sighed. "I suppose you're not going to clue me in on this little joke of yours?"

Kakuza laughed cruelly. "Of course not; not unless knowledge overpowers love."

"Way to hit below the belt."

"Thank you; I know I have skills."

"Shut your damned mouth!"

Kakuza sighed and gave Kurenai a well-earned slap across the face. Kurenai growled a warning, and Kakuza smiled.

"Little tiger," he said softly. Kurenai leaned forward lips parting to reveal sharp white canines on either side of her mouth.

"She bites like one, too," Itachi said, holding up his bandaged hand. "It still stings an hour later."

Kakuza threw a glance at Kurenai's bared fangs. "You better not have rabies."

"That's what he said," she muttered, jerking her head towards Itachi.

"Oh, really?"

"Yeah; really."

"You have quite an attitude, little girl."

"I'm not so little once I'm on top of you."

Itachi sighed. "Okay, little lady, let's see what you know."

"Depends on what you want and how you treat me," Kurenai said. She gave an inaudible sniff and turned her petite nose up to the ceiling, flipping her hair over her shoulder at the same time. "Torture me, there is no doubt that I will suicide."

"Why?" Kakuza asked. "Why? Then you'd just be subjecting yourself to mind searching jutsus, and as long as the cadaver is fresh, it can find anything that the brain once had in memory. And you'd also be leaving your boyfriend in the lurch, so think twice before you bite off your tongue and drown in your own blood."

Kurenai's eyes narrowed and she spat in Kakuza's face. The leader of the Akatsuki stumbled backwards, swore, and gave Kurenai an evil stare.

"You hit me dead center in the eye!"

"Damn right I did!" Kurenai yelled angrily. "How dare you?!"

"How dare _you?"_

Itachi could have sworn electricity traveled between the two as their eyes met.

He sighed and coughed, trying to break the silence. Kurenai seemed none too happy about it, though, and neither did Kakuza.

"One…word…out of you…"

Kurenai rolled her eyes. "Word."

"You're dead!!"

"I'm gonna kill you!!!"

Itachi sighed again and stepped back. "I'm gone."

He let them fight it out.

OOOOOOOOO

Asuma almost ran into Tsunade looking for her.

"Tsunade-sama!" he gasped, shoving the unconscious Kakashi at her. "It's bad! Itachi, and Kisame, and they-"

"Asuma, shut up. Give me him…" Tsunade lifted Kakashi from Asuma's arms with much more care than Asuma had thrust him at her with. "I'll take care of him. If you want to help, you have to do whatever I say, when I say it. Got it?"

Asuma nodded and followed Tsunade to a room. Tsunade laid Kakashi on a bed and pulled the curtain halfway across the track.

"Strip him down to whatever he's wearing under those pants, I need to see what's going on by way of physical injury." Asuma hesitantly pulled Kakashi's clothes off, baring a pale chest and a long, lean body. Kakashi's muscles were rock solid and smooth, and they slightly rippled in response to Asuma's touch. Asuma tried as hard as he could to respect Kakashi, but he couldn't help but smile at the sight of his boxers. It wasn't anything ridiculous, just plain blue, but it was still kind of funny to see your close friend in…nothing but their underwear. Tsunade was pulling medicines out of a cabinet on the opposite wall; syringes, pills, and bottles of liquid. Shizune walked in, carrying Tonton, and quickly assessed the situation.

"What happened this time?" she asked, setting down Tonton on the floor.

"Itachi got him," Asuma grunted, pulling a sheet up over Kakashi's body.

"Tsunade-sama?" Shizune said, pushing up her sleeves.

"Take his vitals, oxygen 50/50 and monitor heart rate and pulse ox, I do _not _want him slipping, got that?"

"And Tonton?"

"If he doesn't behave, it's bacon for dinner tomorrow night."

"BWEH??!!!"

"Get out of here Tonton," Shizune said dryly. "She's in a mood."

"I am not, I just don't want him in the way," Tsunade grouched. "Now do what I told you to!"

Shizune brushed past Asuma with a nod of thanks and picked up the oxygen mask from the table next to the bed and settled it over Kakashi's face. She quickly set the tank and moved to Kakashi's sides, which were raked with scratches and cuts, and set her hands against his sides, glowing with healing chakra.

"Pulse ox is 91, so he's pretty good with respiration. Respiration rate is 30, heart rate is 63, reflexes look okay, no internal damage, it all looks superficial, mental damage is severe."

Tsunade nodded and Shizune removed her hands. "Can I heal the bruises and all?"

"Wait until I examine the patterns; he may have been abused."

Shizune stepped back, next to Asuma, and waited as Tsunade ran her hands down Kakashi's body, sharp eyes taking in every tiny detail.

"The shape of these…" she said slowly. "Asuma, know anything about these bruises?"

"During the battle, Kakashi took a lot of hits, but most of them just glanced off…why?"

"The pattern of these bruises suggests that Kakashi was…sexually abused…do you know anything about that?"

"He wasn't captured recently, but didn't you give him an A-rank a couple days ago?"

Tsunade thought back for a moment. "I did," she said slowly. "I sent him to…Snow, I think, an assassination. He might have suffered for it, although the mission was a success."

"So while the person was…in such close contact with him, he killed him," Asuma said slowly. He exhaled and pulled a packet of cigarettes out of his pocket, along with a lighter.

"Uh-outside, mister!" Shizune scolded, pulling the lighter away from him. Asuma sighed and repossessed his lighter, walking out of the room and down the hall. Shizune watched him go until he rounded the corner, then walked back into the room and waited for Tsunade's next order.

"Tsunade…sama…?"

Tsunade whipped around at the sound of Kakashi's voice. "Kakashi-san!" she gasped, rushing over to him and pulling him into her arms.

"Are you all right?!"

Kakashi sighed and pulled the oxygen mask off his face. Shizune took it from him and switched off the machine, setting it down on the table.

Kakashi was silent.

"Kakashi…?" Tsunade said slowly. "Are you-?"

Kakashi shook his head and collapsed onto her shoulder. Tsunade wordlessly dropped to the bed next to him, wrapping her arms around him and letting him press his face to her shoulder. Tsunade's hands moved to his wrists, healing the breaks immediately.

"Better?"

Kakashi nodded and closed his eyes. It was warm against Tsunade's chest, and he could fall asleep in her arms…

"Come on," she prompted, gently pushing him back to the bed. "You have to rest."

"Tsunade-sama…there's something I didn't tell you…about my last mission…"

"I know," Tsunade said softly. Her hands traced the bruises along Kakashi's stomach and legs. "Bruises tell all tales."

Kakashi sighed and settled once again in Tsunade's embrace. "And…are you mad at me…?"

"For what?" Tsunade asked, bewildered. "Why do you think any of this is your fault?"

Kakashi shrugged. "I don't know…he just said that…we would war and…because I killed him…it would be my fault…"

"Don't you dare think that any of this political crap is your fault," Tsunade gently scolded. "Because it isn't. And dead men tell no tales, right?"

Kakashi thought for a moment. "True," he finally said. "But still…I still feel kinda guilty…"

"It's natural," Tsunade consoled. "Most people do feel that way after something terrible happens to them like that; death of a family member, a kidnapping, a killing, a rape…either to them or someone close to them, you will always feel guilty. It's just how you're going to feel for a while. But don't worry; I'll always be here for you, and you know you have friends who will back you no matter what."

Kakashi nodded. "And about that…Kurenai, she…she tried to save me from Itachi and…she stayed, and told us to go, and after that, I had no clue, I was out, but I remember Asuma telling her not to, but then I totally lost it…"

Tsunade exhaled. "I'll get the full report from Asuma. For now, just sleep."

Kakashi nodded again and Tsunade put him down against the pillows. "Shizune can stay for a little while, she still has to heal those nasty bruises."

Shizune stepped forward. "Okay, I can take it. If you want to leave Tonton…"

"Sure. When I find him, I will send him in."

A small smile teased at the corners of Kakashi's mouth, crinkling the edges of the mask. "He'll be miles away by now," he said. "That bacon thing…oh, yeah. He's gone."

Tsunade grinned as Shizune moved in. Her pale hands graced Kakashi's abused sides, and Kakashi could feel waves of relief as the wounds closed over and bruises healed.

"Shhhhhh, relax," she whispered, ghosting the bruises as gently as possible. "It might hurt if you don't."

Kakashi lay quietly as Shizune's hands moved over his entire body, but she hesitated at his hips.

"Are you going to freak out if I touch you?"

A tremor went through Kakashi's body, and he shrugged. "I'm not sure…" he said slowly. Shizune tentatively stretched her hands down, running them along Kakashi's smooth, softly curving hips. "I can see why anyone would want you," she murmured. "You're beautiful…"

Kakashi fought down the urge to shy away as healing sent it's calming sensations through his legs and stomach. Shizune watched him closely for any signs of distress, ready to pull away if Kakashi was too uncomfortable. But the moment never came, and Shizune simply kept working down Kakashi's smooth, muscular body, feeling the ripples of hardened muscles and the satin-like feel of his milky-white skin. Kakashi made no effort to push her away and allowed Shizune to heal whatever she found.

Asuma re-entered, seemingly in a better mood now that he had smoked a cigarette or two. "Aaaaah, that's better," he said, stretching up his arms. "A couple cigarettes will do one wonders."

"Shut up, Asuma," Shizune snapped, grasping Kakashi's ankles. "We all know it's bad for you."

Asuma glared. "Whatever."

Shizune sighed. "Would you shut up for a minute so I can concentrate on him?"

Asuma obliged and stepped up to Kakashi's side. A large hand rested in his hair, stroking back the fallen locks of liquid silver.

"How are you feeling?"

Willing to take comfort from anyone, Kakashi moved his head to the hand that meant to quiet him, allowing Asuma to push his hair back from his face.

"Okay, I guess."

A look of concern crossed Asuma's face. "You sure?"

Kakashi nodded. "Yeah, I think I'll live."

Shizune's hands were lifted from Kakashi's body and she set them on her knees and leaned forward. "Such a pretty face," she said softly. "Do you want me let you sleep, or should I stay?"  
Kakashi shrugged. "If you have other stuff to do, then go ahead, don't let me hold you down."  
Shizune smiled. "As a matter of fact, I do have some paperwork, but I can bring it in here."

Kakashi smiled a bit underneath his mask. "Thank you."

Shizune could see the gratitude in his eyes as she told him she would stay with him. "Asuma, can you stay for a second?"

"Sure," Asuma said. He sat down on the edge of the bed, next to Kakashi's head. Shizune quietly exited the room, leaving Asuma alone with Kakashi.

Neither male moved.

For the longest time.

And Asuma came to a startling realization about his friend.

**A/N: Thank you everyone who reviewed, I hope you like the story so far!**


	4. Chapter 4

"…You know, you could have just used a kunai."

"…Bite me."

Kurenai was standing in front of Itachi, trying to dig a piece of metal out from underneath his flesh. The missing-nin had insisted, and eventually had relented to Kurenai's demands of making dinner herself that night. "Neither of you can cook," she had grouched, and Itachi had let her. Now, he sat flinching in pain as she shoved her fingers into his arm, aiming for the shrapnel in his forearm.

"Ouch…! Not so-_ow!"_

"Hold still, you little ass!"

"Bite me!"

Itachi glared at Kurenai as she withdrew her hand, holding the piece of metal. "And what the hell were you doing that you got a piece of metal stuck in your arm?"

"Mission," Itachi grunted, still watching as Kurenai found a roll of bandages and gauze. "This will sting," she warned, pulling the top off a bottle of ointment.

"I'm a ninja, Kurenai," Itachi snapped. "I'm used to pain."

Kurenai shrugged. "Whatever."

Itachi hissed in pain as Kurenai swept the iodine across the open wound, trying to clean it out. "Get a tetanus shot as soon as you can," she said as she worked. "Tetanus lives in metal, and since this is under the fat on your skin, you need a vaccination."

Itachi hissed again as Kurenai went after the wound again, but he didn't move. "And where do you suppose I get this?"

Kurenai shrugged. "I know a guy. How about I get it for you?"

Itachi sighed. "I will be asking a few people if it's safe, you know that, right?"

"Of course," Kurenai said. "Anyway, would you please hold still?"  
Itachi glared, but stilled his motion.

Kurenai set the iodine aside and reached for the gauze. "Don't move." She quickly wrapped it around the gash, putting enough pressure on it to stop the bleeding. "This should absorb the blood, and the bandages will be there to catch whatever this doesn't and to hold this in place."

Itachi nodded as Kurenai cut the gauze and began winding bandages over that. "Where'd you learn to do this?"

"I got lots of practice," Kurenai said ruefully. Itachi believed it; Kurenai's touch was surprisingly gentle for a ninja's. Kurenai taped the bandages in place and pulled Itachi's sleeve back down. "Come on, you," she said, stepping back. "You're good. I should have that vaccine in a few days."

Itachi wordlessly nodded and stood up. "So, what are you making?"

"When I find something, I will let you know."  
Itachi smirked. "Better than me. I usually tell Kisame to do whatever he wants, because I don't know."  
Kurenai opened a cabinet and peeked inside. Reaching into the back, she pulled out a dusty can of…Itachi actually had no idea what it was. Turning it, Kurenai wiped the dust off a spot and squinted to read the side.

"Oh, no," she said slowly.

"What?" Itachi asked, walking over.

"The expiration date is a higher number than Kisame's IQ!"

"Bite me," the shark-man muttered as he slammed the door. For a moment he just stood there, staring at Kurenai, and then he dropped his enormous sword in the middle of the floor and sighed.

"Bleh…horrible day of missions…"

"Don't talk," Itachi snapped. He held up his bandaged arm, and the fishnet shirt he was wearing did little to hide the bandages. "Piece of metal flew at me in an explosion and lodged in my arm. SO this one goes in with her bare hands and digs it out! And then she gets vicious with the iodine and tells me she's getting me a vaccination for tetanus, because it lives in metal."

Kisame laughed. "Haha, you need a-ouch, watch it!!"

"Mmm!" Itachi stuck out his tongue and made a face. "Haha, now who's laughing?"

"Asshole." Kisame slunk into the next room and collapsed on the couch. "Somebody get me food."

Kurenai threw the can at Kisame's head…and hit dead center.

"Hey!!" Kisame picked up the can and hurled it back at Itachi. "It's older than you anyway!"

"And how do you know how old I am?"

Kisame sighed and chucked the can into the garbage can. "Okay, since you're all being asses I'm going to my room. Let me know when you find something edible for dinner."

"Go fish."

"I'm too tired."

Itachi smiled and turned back to Kurenai. "Okay, so is there anything in there we can eat?"  
Kurenai shrugged. "When I find something, I will be glad to let you know." 

OOOOOOOOO

Asuma paced in front of Tsunade angrily.

"Come on, what is taking so long?!"

"I'm trying, Asuma, now calm down!"

Asuma sighed and collapsed in a chair. "I'm just stressed, that's all. My best friend was raped and is currently in the hospital with extreme trauma from a torture jutsu and my girlfriend is the prisoner of the Akatsuki, more specifically the very man who tortured the aforementioned friend!"

Tsunade sighed. "I'm working on it, and so are the ANBU."  
Tsunade stood over Kakashi, searching his mind to try to see what exactly had happened. Kakashi was asleep, but he knew what Tsunade would be doing in case he woke up. Tsunade had found nothing so far, and Kakashi was beginning to wake up. Tsunade sighed and sifted through one last section of Kakashi's memory.

"This looks around the time I need," she mused. "About five days ago."  
Asuma nodded and walked over to Tsunade's side. He sat down on the edge of Kakashi's bed and placed one of his hands on the jounin's forehead.

"He's hot."  
Tsunade nodded. "He came down with a fever last night."

Asuma sighed and removed his hand. "Will he be okay?"

"Probably," Tsunade said slowly. "Hold on, I think I found something."  
Tsunade dug deeper into Kakashi's mind, seeing the image of Itachi. _What the…?_ Itachi was running through the forest, heading North-

"I got it!"

"What?"

"The location of the Akatsuki headquarters!" Tsunade jumped up. "Wake him, please?"  
Asuma nodded and gently took Kakashi's shoulders in his hands. "Kakashi," he murmured, slightly shaking the jounin. "Kakashi, wake up, Tsunade's done."

Kakashi's mis-matched eyes slowly opened, and he turned onto his back to stare into Asuma's face.

"Did she find anything?" he asked, still a bit asleep. Kakashi sat up and pressed a small hand to his forehead. "My head is pounding…"  
Asuma nodded. "She was able to figure out where the Akatsuki actually had their headquarters," he continued, "and she's going to find some ANBU to go with her to find Kurenai."

Kakashi nodded and leaned back against the pillow. "I'm cold."

"How can you be cold? You have a fever of 101, and you're as sick as a dog. How can you possibly be cold?"

Kakashi shrugged and found the blanket from where it had tangled in his feet. "I dunno…"  
Asuma sighed. "Are you hungry at all?"  
Kakashi shook his head. "Where's Tsunade-sama now?"

"Probably in her office summoning ANBU."

Kakashi closed his eyes. "Okay. Tell her I'll be asleep."

"You're a cat," Asuma said dryly. "You sleep all day, you're very aloof, and you seem concerned about your hair…"  
Kakashi shrugged. Asuma thought it was one of the most innocent looks he had ever been given by Kakashi.

"Yeah…yeah, sure…"

He stood and walked out of the room, softly closing the door behind him.

OOOOOOOOO

Kurenai finally found a box of rice that hadn't expired three years ago and some frozen vegetables that hadn't been freezer burned and some near-fresh meat in the refrigerator. These she threw into one frying pan and cooked for long enough to defrost them and then found a bottle of Teriyaki sauce in the back of the refrigerator. By some stroke of luck it was still good, and Kurenai had managed to get a decent dinner on the table for the first time since Itachi had joined the Akatsuki.

Itachi had taken his food and went into the living room; Kurenai didn't know why, but the Uchiha looked like he was in a bad mood so she decided to leave him alone. As she was cleaning up, she could have sworn she heard him leave, but she didn't see him at all for the rest of the night.

Kurenai went to bed that night thinking about Asuma.

At around two in the morning, she woke up to the door opening. Startled, Kurenai reached for the kunai she had "borrowed" from Itachi and sat up, ready to defend herself. Instead, she only heard someone collapsing on the couch outside her room. Kurenai slowly stepped out of bed, pushing back the covers, and opened her door.

Itachi lay across the arms of the couch, bleeding badly from several large wounds on his body.

Kurenai gasped and rushed over to him. Apparently, Itachi hadn't seen or heard her come out of her room, because he started when he heard her gasp. He relaxed when he saw it was only her, and let her examine his wounds.

"I didn't see you go out," she whispered, trying not to wake Kisame. Itachi hissed and flinched as Kurenai's fingers danced over the wounds, and Kurenai felt him shrink back a bit.

"Genjutsu," he grunted. "Okay, find someone who knows how to heal," he continued, and Kurenai straightened.

"Hold still."

"What the-?!"

Kurenai's hands glowed an eerie green in the dark of Itachi's apartment at night, and Itachi watched in fascination as the wounds began to close over before his eyes.

"How do you know how to heal?" he asked.

"I learned from Tsunade-sama," Kurenai said simply. "Now stop moving, I can't do this right if you're moving."

Itachi stilled his motion and held completely still as Kurenai's hands roamed his body. Everywhere, cuts, bruises, and abrasions vanished with the passing of Kurenai's soft, gentle hands, and Itachi could feel even old scar tissue repairing itself.

Finally, Kurenai lifted her hands. "I'm done."

Itachi slowly sat up, staring at the now-clean patches of skin where wounds used to be. "How…did you do this…?"  
Kurenai shook her head. "Never you mind. Consider it repayment for whatever I owe you."

Itachi nodded and stood up.

"Get to sleep now," Kurenai said. "I'll hear your story in the morning."

OOOOOOOOO

Itachi woke up to a harsh scream.

"_Wake up, you little bastard!!!"  
_Itachi rolled over, mumbling something horrible at Kurenai under his breath.

"It's Kurenai, you freak, now get up!!"

Itachi reached for the kunai he had slipped underneath his pillow the previous night and hurled it blindly at his antagonizer. Apparently it had hit, or at least grazed the person, because there was another screech and someone slapped him firmly on the rear.

"That was…naughty, Itachi…" the person muttered, then took hold of the covers and yanked them off Itachi's body.

"Get up, already!"

"Kakuza shut your trap."

"I-I'm your leader, don't you dare talk to me like that!"

"You're also weaker than me."

"Respect your elders!"

"Respect those who can snap your head from your neck in a matter of seconds unless you want them to. Now leave, I want to sleep."  
Kakuza sighed and slapped Itachi's rump again. "Get up, _now."_

"No."

"Insolent little child! Do as you're told!"

"No."

Kakuza leaned over and gripped Itachi's hair at the nape of his neck. "Orochimaru is here for you."

All of a sudden, Itachi was very much awake. "Cool! I get to spar with someone who lasts longer than six seconds! And then, when he's next to dead on the ground, I get to rub it in his snaky face!"

Kurenai walked in just as Kakuza mentioned Orochimaru. "Cool," she commented as Itachi said he would pound Orochimaru into the ground. "Can I watch?"

"Sure," Itachi said. "It's gonna be good this time, because it'll be my fifth time beating him bloody and senseless."

Kurenai sighed. "I guess I'll be playing den mother to more than one person today."  
Kakuza arched one eyebrow, then yanked the pillow out from underneath Itachi's head and smacked him firmly with it. "Up. Now."

Itachi's Mangekyou glared back, and Kakuza took an uncertain step back.

"Out. Now."

Kakuza reluctantly abandoned all attempts at making Itachi comply and fled the room. Kurenai sat down next to Itachi and smiled.

"Boxers."

Itachi looked down. Sure enough, his boxers were slipping down his hips, and he was almost completely exposed to a giggling Kurenai. Blushing furiously, the Uchiha yanked them back up, giving Kurenai a vicious glare.

"I suppose that's funny, huh?" he snapped.

"Yeah, it is," Kurenai replied. "Anyway, you need to get dressed, and I need to hear your sob story from last night."  
Itachi sighed. "I went out last night to get more food. On the way there, I met…an old friend, how about, and it seems he was still mad at me for an old…um, offense. Total accident, but he was an ass about it, so…yeah…we fought, I won, and he slunk off into the bushes puking blood."

Kurenai raised an eyebrow. "An who might this old friend be?"

"The Yakushi's boy; Kabuto, I think his name was."

Kurenai's eyes widened. "Kabuto? Did you say…_Yakushi Kabuto_?"

"Yeah…" Itachi said slowly. "Why?"

"Where is he now?"

"He's a subordinate of Orochimaru's, so I suspect he went back to him…"

"And where's Orochimaru?"

"Right here, bitch."

Kurenai whirled, seeing the sannin standing in the doorway, snickering. "Cute," he sneered, motioning to Itachi's boxers. Itachi's cheeks flamed, and he advanced on Orochimaru with something like bloodlust.

"Say that again," he whispered, a dead calm in his voice. "Say it again, say it to my face, who horrible little ass."

Orochimaru barely flinched before the superior ninja. Of course; even if he were afraid, Orochimaru would never show it.

"Kabuto, I believe someone was wondering where you were."

A young, silver haired boy stepped out from behind Orochimaru. Glasses half-hid his eyes and reflected the light in an eerie manner that made Kurenai shiver. Orochimaru looked at Kurenai and smirked much the same way Kabuto was.

"Remember us…?"

**A/N: I have gotten really positive reactions from the ItaKuren parts of this, and I'm glad you all like it. Feel free to give me ideas for this, I can always use them…Thank you everyone who reviews in advance!! . Hugs!!**


	5. Chapter 5

Kurenai sighed and flopped back on the couch. A week, and no sign of Asuma, no sign of Konoha nin, and no sign of any attempt to reclaim her. She was going to have to do this herself…

"You're not thinking of going someplace, are you?"  
Kurenai looked up at the sound of Itachi walking in. "No," she said slowly. "I'm just thinking, period. What Kakuza said…about Asuma being a jinchuuriki…"

Itachi nodded. "He is. He contains the Four-tailed…Swallow, I believe."

Kurenai sat up abruptly. "He has a ninjutsu/taijutsu move called the Flying Swallow!"

Itachi nodded again. "He probably gets that from the demon."  
Kurenai exhaled slowly and sank back again. "This sucks."

Itachi shoved her to the side and sat down next to her. "Suck it up and deal."

Kurenai glared and considered punching him.

"Don't punch me."

"What are you gonna do about it?"

"…Kick you."

"So original."  
They lapsed into silence, until Itachi said, "What are you going to do if we succeed in capturing Asuma? You know we need to extract the demon from him-"

Kurenai stood up, whirling to face Itachi. "And you know I'll defend him with my life."

Itachi shrugged. "You know as well as I do that I won't be able to help either of you if Kakuza sets his mind to the demon."

"You wouldn't dare…!"

"I would if I had to."

Kurenai set her jaw and turned. "I hate you."

"I know you do."  
The kuniochi groaned and stomped out of the room, storming. Itachi spread his feet out on the couch and shrugged. _What she doesn't know is that we are well on our way to three of the demons. _

OOOOOOOOO

Asuma was pacing again.

_What if she finds out? _

_What if they want to get the demon? _

_What if they want a hostage? _

_What if they need the rest of the demons, so they go after the others? _

_What if they come back for Kakashi? The poor thing has no idea… _

_What if-? _

"Asuma."

Asuma snapped out of his daze and turned to face Tsunade. Tsunade was smiling a bit, and a squad on ANBU trailed behind her.

"We're going to get Kurenai now. I have no doubt that she is still alive, and I need you to watch Kakashi while I'm gone. Shizune should be here, but he's traumatized badly and he needs someone there. Try not to leave him alone. I don't care who's with him, if he trusts them and you trust them, that's great. But don't leave him alone."

Asuma nodded, and Tsunade turned to the ANBU. "Any of you wanna see something cool?"

Everyone shrugged hesitantly, unsure if they should consent to Tsunade's "cool." The Hokage spun, emitting a large amount of chakra-

"Release!"

Asuma knew a genjutsu had been released, and he looked at Tsunade, puzzled.

The Hokage was dressed in an ANBU uniform, skin-tight black to the silver vest. A porcelain mask was in her hand, which was painted with red and black. Asuma recognized the mask as the Tiger, and smiled.

"You used to be in ANBU?"

"Yeah," Tsunade said. "Feels good to be back." She settled the mask over her face and turned, showing off the two katanas crossed on her back. Red ribbons trailed from the ends of the swords, ending at Tsunade's waist. "Let's go!"

Asuma sank onto the edge of the bed where Kakashi was dozing and put his face in his hands. _This is not going to work- _

"Asuma…?"

Kakashi sounded groggy, sleepy. Asuma had to smile, though; Kakashi could probably sleep for days. "Yeah…?"

"Kurenai's gonna be okay. Stop worrying."

Asuma smiled. "Yeah…yeah, everything's going to work out…"

Kakashi sat up, sheets slipping down to reveal his boxers. "I know."

Asuma's head snapped up. "You know what?" he asked sharply.

"I know you're a jinchuuriki."

Asuma exhaled. "Have you told-"

"No one."

Asuma sighed. "How long?"

"Remember when we were in the locker room…about a month ago…you had just come out of the shower and your towel was slipping down…I saw the seal on your stomach."  
Asuma's head fell back into his hands, and he felt a shock wave go through him. The seal was coming out…it shouldn't be. He had been sealed with a seal that was set so that it would not show up. Ever. So why was it showing up…?

Or maybe it wasn't. Maybe Kakashi's Sharingan had something to do with it…Asuma shook his head. He was tired, he was stressed, and he felt sick with worry. Kakashi looked at him curiously.

"Are you okay?"

Asuma shook his head. "Since you know I'm a jinchuuriki…"

"Nothing's going to change," Kakashi said, resting his forearms on his bent knees. "I'm still going to be your best friend, next to Kurenai, and nothing's going to change at all…"  
Asuma smiled and raised his head to look at Kakashi. "Thanks," he whispered. "I never really expected anything to change but still…"  
Kakashi nodded. "I know it's hard…Naruto's my student, so I see it every day."

"Speaking of Naruto…he said he wanted o see you, and that he was coming by some time to day."

Kakashi nodded. "He said he was coming around noon…oh well."

"When he comes, I'm going to leave, okay? I've got to take care of my team…"

"Of course."

_"Sensei!!" _

"Naruto, keep it down-oof!"  
Naruto tackled Kakashi, throwing the jounin back against the pillow. "Naruto-get off!!"

"No way! I missed you!! And what happened to you anyway?"  
Kakashi sighed. "I was tied to a cross and stabbed for three days. My best friend's girlfriend was just captured by the Akatsuki. And I was raped a couple days ago. Anything I missed?"

Naruto's jaw fell slack at the list. "Sen…sei…?"  
Kakashi shoved Naruto off and turned onto his side. "I'll live."  
Naruto looked up and motioned to someone else to come in. Kakashi heard footsteps, but didn't bother to look up. He already knew who it was.

"Sensei," the girl said shyly. "Are you okay…?"

"No."  
Sakura sighed and placed a small bouquet of flowers on the small table next to his bed and sat down beside Naruto. A tentative hand touched his shoulder blades, and Kakashi stiffened. Sakura's hand shot back, and Kakashi turned over.

"What?"

"Aw, don't be like that," Naruto said. "We just want to cheer you up, you know, since all you're doing is sitting in here being emo and cutting yourself…"  
Kakashi sighed. "First of all, I am not cutting myself. Second of all, I wish I could cut my throat. So leave."

"Hell no. Not if you're that emo."

Kakashi sighed. "What can I do to get rid of you?"

"Nothing."

Kakashi sighed again and pulled his pillow over his head. "Someone save me from the horrible yellow…"

Naruto held back the urge to slap Kakashi.

It was hard, but he managed.

Barely.

"Come on, sensei!!" Naruto cried, pulling at his pillow. Kakashi only held on tighter, and Naruto growled in frustration. "Come _on_!"

A high-pitched whine rose in Kakashi's throat, and he raised a leg in warning. Naruto, oblivious to Kakashi's warning, continued the tug-of-war with Kakashi. Sighing, Kakashi kicked back, catching Naruto in the side. Naruto yelped, more in surprise than pain, and released Kakashi's pillow.

"Out. Now."

Sakura's hand began to gently glow with healing chakra. "He's stressed," she told Naruto. "He just needs a bit of time to…adjust, I guess…"

Naruto looked so lost Sakura almost laughed. "He's traumatized. Badly."

Sakura pressed her hand to Kakashi's bare back and let the healing chakra flow into his body. Kakashi stiffened against Sakura's hand, but otherwise didn't move. Sakura continued letting chakra slip into Kakashi's body, Asuma and Naruto watching curiously.

Kakashi never moved.

Sakura sighed. She knew her sensei was in distress, and she could do nothing to help him.

OOOOOOOOO

Itachi picked up his bag and left quietly, Kisame tailing him. He had a mission to go on, and he didn't need Kurenai finding out what it was. She would be hopping mad, and then fly off on a rampage. Even Kisame was strangely quiet as the pair slipped through the darkened halls, on their way back to Konoha. They had left at midnight for a reason; Kurenai would be asleep. And Deidara would be calling Itachi's apartment "home" for the next few days…

OOOOOOOOO

"So…remind me why we're doing this again…?"

"Kakashi knows too much," Itachi hissed under his breathe. He knew it was dangerous to talk here; the trees had ears.

Kisame nodded as he and Itachi set up a camp in the middle of the woods. They had agreed to get close to Konoha that night, then rest and get into Konoha the next day. They would find Kakashi and take him at dusk, and be back at the Akatsuki by noon the next day. If everything went smoothly, it would be flawless. But if Kakashi decided to throw a fit, and doubtless in Itachi's mind he would, they would be delayed, or even caught depending on how lucky they were that day. Itachi sighed and crawled into his sleeping bag.

"Sleep. And you'll have hell to pay if you disrupt me."  
Kisame knew he would.

OOOOOOOOO

Kurenai woke up the next morning to…silence.

_Now's my chance! _she thought. _Finally… _

Kurenai quickly looked around, checking for traps or sentries of any kind. She used every genjutsu skill she knew; nothing. Not a soul in the room. Smiling, Kurenai headed for her pile of clothes; her underwear, her dress, her shoes; everything. She yanked them on in a hurry, making sure she had her kunai pouch and shuriken holster. For once, she was grateful for Kisame's carelessness; he had left them not in his room or Itachi's, but hers. He had hidden them under the edge of the dresser, probably thinking she would not think to look there. But Kurenai wasn't stupid; she knew where he was hiding her things. She retrieved them even faster then she had put her clothes on and headed for the window.

"Suckers," she sing-songed, shoving open the window and jumping out. "I've got a date with a little something called freedom!"

Kurenai ran for the forest, heading South and East. She knew exactly where Konoha was; that was why she usually went on missions with Asuma. Good as he was at fighting an opponent, he was no good at finding them or tracking. He had once confessed to Kurenai that he was barely able to tell North from South, and he was only able to tell from the sun's positioning over Earth. Kurenai had laughed and told him to pair with her and Kakashi; they knew which way was North, without looking at the sun. Asuma had laughed as well, and accepted her offer. Now, Kurenai put her skills to use and headed for Konoha again.

**A/N: Sorry this is late…but the good news is, it's spring break for me, so I can write more and stuff…bleh, that's all. Love it, or hate it, I don't care, as long as you don't flame me. Thanks!! **


	6. Chapter 6

Asuma was tempted to fall asleep right then and there.

Kakashi was in a mood, and Naruto and Sakura had left him alone. Asuma was left with Kakashi, and he was dead tired. He was sitting next to Kakashi now, one hand absently resting in his friend's soft silver hair.

"You okay?" he murmured. He wasn't sure if Kakashi was awake or not, but he might be from the way he was shifting…

"No."

Asuma smiled, and his hand began to move in Kakashi's hair. "Come on, don't be like that."

Kakashi grunted a response and turned over, onto his back. "Do you want something?"

Asuma shrugged. "I got left here with you."

Kakashi turned back onto his stomach. "Sucks for you."

Asuma sighed. "You're a very difficult little child, you know that?"

"Tsunade-sama once told me I had the mind of a six-year-old who didn't want to finish his vegetables."

"I believe her!" Asuma cried. "You're so outrageously stubborn…"

"Got a problem with that?"

Asuma sighed again. "There is no talking to you, is there?"

"Nope."

_At least he's honest…._

OOOOOOOOO

Kurenai sped through the forest at practically light speed. She had realized that Tsunade was at the head of the team of ANBU long ago; now she just needed to find them…

And lo and behold, there they were, resting by a brook. Kurenai jumped down from her tree.

"Tsunade-sama!"

Tsunade spun around, several shuriken jumping to her hands. Two ANBU leaped in front of her protectively.

"Oh, it's Kurenai," they said, and slowly stepped aside.

"Wait a second," Tsunade said. "I'm asking you something only the real Kurenai would know."

Kurenai shrugged. There wasn't much that might qualify, since she shared everything with Asuma, but maybe…

"Who did you lose your virginity to?"

O.O

"Asuma?" Kurenai said tentatively. "That's really personal, you really shouldn't ask those kinds of questions-"

Tsunade sighed. "It's her."

Kurenai bent down and picked up a rock.

"Here," she said, thrusting it at the nearest ANBU. The ANBU took it hesitantly.

"What's this…?"

"Big rock."

"…What do you want me to do with it…?"

"_Kill me_!"

The ANBU sighed and dropped the rock. "Yeah, yeah, don't leave your boyfriend in the lurch."

"Tsunade-sama, I am going to hurt you so bad for that."

Tsunade grinned. "Thanks."

Kurenai plopped down on the ground with a sigh. "How is Asuma, anyway?"

"He's fine," Tsunade said, sitting down next to her. "It's Kakashi I'm worried about. What exactly did Itachi do to him? Kakashi agreed to let me search his mind, but he was damaged, severely. A lot of information I found was cloudy and kind of…"

Kurenai nodded. "I'm not really sure what happened, either. When I talked to him all I could gather was 'stabbed' and 'three days' and I thought he said something about a cross."

Tsunade nodded. "That fits. So Itachi tied him to a cross and stabbed him for seventy-two hours…that would screw anybody up."

Kurenai exhaled and leaned back against a tree trunk. "So…what brings you out to this neck of the woods?"

"We were actually looking for you," Tsunade said. "I found one clear image in Kakashi's mind, and it was the Akatsuki headquarters. _How _Kakashi knows that, I do not know, and it's not important. What matters is that we have you back."

Kurenai shrugged. "I actually got out of there because no one was guarding my room. Busted the window and ran for it."

Tsunade nodded. "So we came here for nothing, really."

Kurenai put her hands behind her head and leaned back. "Guess so."  
Tsunade sighed and stood up. "Whatever. I guess we should head back, then. Kakashi will be happy to see you."

"He'll probably be in a mood," Kurenai said sourly. "Right after the shock of being injured wears off, he gets cranky. Hormones, I guess."

"Na, testosterone," Tsunade replied. She held out a hand, and Kurenai used it to pull herself to her feet. "Boys are unstable little creatures, so it's up to us women to hold them together."

Kurenai laughed and stretched her arms up. "Well, then, let's get going. Kakashi and Asuma are probably falling apart."

OOOOOOOOO

Asuma was dozing against the wall, Kakashi simply tossing and turning. He didn't really expect anything to happen; he was just bored and stressed.

That was when the door opened.

"All right, you moody little brat, get up, I'm back, and I'm not dead!!"

Kakashi threw the pillow at Kurenai laughing. "You had to jump on me, didn't you?"

Kurenai's wicked grin spread even further. "Of course I did, silly! You never would have woken up otherwise!"

Kakashi sighed and whacked her again with his pillow. "Get off. Go jump on Asuma, I'm sure he'd love it."

Kurenai gave an indignant squeal and smacked Kakashi with his own pillow, then untangled herself from him and tackled Asuma from the side.

"Wake up!!"

Asuma grunted as Kurenai slammed into him, and the two wrestled it out on the floor. Tsunade grinned and waltzed over to Kakashi, leaning over and placing a gentle kiss on his forehead.

"Come here, you," she murmured, and pressed Kakashi to her shoulder. As she expected, Kakashi returned the embrace, and settled against her chest.

"You okay?"

"No."

Kurenai looked up from her wrestling match with Asuma to grin at Tsunade. "Told you he was in a mood."

Tsunade grinned and held Kakashi at arm's length, closely examining his figure. "You're fine," she declared, and pulled him close again.

"Kurenai," Asuma was saying, "There's…something I need to tell you…Kakashi already knows, but he found out by accident…"

Kurenai nodded. "You're a jinchuuriki," she said. "Yeah, Kakuza told me."

"Kakuza?"

"Leader of the Akatsuki. Listen, Asuma, I need to tell you something too. Itachi and Kisame took off last night and left someone else in charge of me. They weren't very good, considering I got out by breaking the window and running, but you have to be careful. Itachi and Kisame might be coming for you, and I don't know-"

"Kurenai, Kurenai, calm down," Asuma shushed. "I know, don't worry."

Kurenai sighed. "I'm sorry, this is my fault-"

"Oh, don't you start too!" Asuma cried. "None of this is your fault!"

Kurenai sighed. "I still feel guilty…"

"You and Kakashi, with the angst and the guilt! Seriously, you two!"

Kurenai smiled. Asuma was fine…and Kakashi was still in a mood.

OOOOOOOOO

Itachi was pacing.

He was bored and restless, and impatient. Itachi wasn't a patient person to begin with; he had rushed it a bit with Kakashi. Yes, he had made the jounin scream in agony for three days. Yes, he had broken his sprit extensively. _Yes, _he could have killed him, but left him for some reason. But there was still something Itachi felt he needed to do…oh yes.

Shred that damned Yuuhi.

He really wanted to shred her boyfriend, too, but he was a jinchuuriki, so he couldn't kill him until they had the demon. And Kakashi…he just wanted him to fulfill his own satanic pleasures. Not to mention the jounin knew far too much, and Itachi had to get rid of him somehow…so now he had a cast iron reason for capturing and torturing the jounin. Feh…weak-minded fool. He really should have just-

"Itachi."

Itachi looked at Kisame. "What, fish sticks?"

"Stop calling me that," Kisame grumbled. "Anyway, what the _hell _are we doing just standing here?"

Itachi fisted down the urge to punch Kisame's lights out.

It was hard, but he managed.

Not.

Itachi dealt him a real wallop over the head, and Itachi could have sworn he heard Kisame' brains rattle.

"Well what was that for?" Kisame whined, glaring at Itachi.

"For being stupid. I hope I knocked some intelligence into you."

Kisame had had enough from Itachi for one day, and decided to gain back an ounce of respect. Itachi glared at the raised finger and smacked him again.

"Ouch! Stop doing that!"

"You don't have any brains left to knock around so I don't know why I still smack you."

"So stop!"

Itachi sighed and smacked Kisame again. "Let's go. It's midnight. Kakashi should be alone by now. We grab him and run. If you see anyone, you rip 'em to shreds. Got that? Leave Kakashi too me."

Kisame sighed. "Fine."

Itachi opened the window. He was surprised it wasn't locked; Kakashi may have had it open, though, to get some air. Whatever the reason, Itachi was grateful; Kakashi had just made his job a lot easier.

The jounin was sleeping soundly on his side. His masked face was bathed in moonlight, pale and white. He looked so innocent…

Itachi shook himself. Beautiful as he was, Itachi had to handle him roughly, otherwise the jounin would fight him viciously. If he presented himself as a threat from the beginning, the chances were much larger that Kakashi would be caught off guard and submit to him.

Oh, who was he kidding, the jounin would throw a fit.

Itachi slid through, motioning to Kisame to stay until he saw someone. Kisame backed down with a bit of grumbling, but he did as he was told. Itachi approached Kakashi, praying the jounin would sleep through-

Oh, crap.

Kakashi awoke with a start, how Itachi didn't know. He hadn't made a sound…oh, well. It wasn't important. He darted forward, snatched Kakashi, and plastered his hand over Kakashi's mouth.

"Shut your damn little mouth," Itachi spat, pinning the jounin's arms to his sides. He could feel Kakashi begin to tremble under his hands, and he was almost surprised. Kakashi was crumbling-so easily? Well, again-Kakashi was making his life so much easier.

Itachi dragged Kakashi over to the window and handed hi to Kisame. "Get as far away from here as possible and keep him quiet. I've got to do something."

Kisame nodded and pulled Kakashi behind him as he began to run across the treetops. Kakashi followed, and Itachi watched him go until he couldn't see them anymore. He turned back to the room and slid through the doorway, heading for where he knew a certain someone would be.

OOOOOOOOO

As it turned out, Tsunade had actually gone home to sleep tonight-Itachi would have thought she would have crashed near Kakashi. Sighing, Itachi ran off to find her.

Plan B.

Tsunade's mansion was huge-but of course, she was the Hokage. She would have a huge house. Itachi found her window almost immediately and snuck in.

"Tsunade," he whispered, gently shaking her.

"Hm?" Tsunade turned over, jumping when she saw Itachi.

"What do you want?" she hissed, jumping to her feet. Itachi shrugged.

"Just wanted to show you what happened to Kakashi."

"_Shizune!!!"_

"Too late," Itachi said smoothly, and grabbed Tsunade's hair. "Tsukiyomi!"

In a heartbeat, the world turned red.

"Uchiha Itachi, you are going to pay for this!" Tsunade gasped, yanking at her bonds. She glared down at Itachi, standing below her with a katana.

"Seventy-two hours of this," he murmured, and thrust the katana into her side. "Enjoy."

OOOOOOOOO

Shizune heard Tsunade's call and rushed to her bedroom immediately. She had heard the screams as well-what had happened? No one could have gotten in past her defenses…unless…

Shizune slid the door aside, and saw Itachi, hovering over Tsunade, Mangekyou Sharingan blazing. Shizune gasped, and Tsunade dropped to the ground, writhing in pain.

"What did you do to her?!" she screamed. She pulled up her sleeve, revealing the needles on her arm. These she shot at Itachi, watching as they all went past him to strike the wall. Shizune swept forward, striking at him with another needle. Itachi could see the poison dripping from its tip, and dodged the deadly liquid. Shizune drove him back, and Itachi realized too late what she was doing. His Sharingan was a bit tired; he might have overdone it with Tsunade. And the fool's sprit was probably still intact as well…

_She's fast._

"Die, you-!"

Itachi found a kunai in his cloak and held it before him in defense._ Dammit, I _did _overdo the Sharingan-!_

Shizune ducked Itachi's swing, sliding underneath him and striking-

A Shadow Clone.

Shizune gasped as the clone disappeared, and Itachi reappeared behind her.

"Shizune! Behind you!"

Shizune turned-

Half a second too late.

Itachi continued past her to Tsunade, kunai glinting in the half-light from the moon. Tsunade kicked out, striking blindly at Itachi. Itachi easily avoided the blow, and ducked underneath Tsunade's defense. Tsunade leaned back, trying one last time to get in a hit before Itachi found her arms and pulled her away.

Shizune wasn't about to take this lying down. She scrambled to her feet, shooting a new batch of needles at Itachi. Itachi ducked, falling on top of Tsunade.

Bad move.

Tsunade's jaws closed on Itachi's neck, resulting in a slap and a kick. _Don't let go-come on, don't let go, don't let go, don't let go-_

Itachi kicked her again, and shoved his finger into the corner of her mouth, prying her jaws apart. Tsunade turned on him again, this time biting down on his hand.

"Dammit, do you ever give up?!"

Itachi groaned and smacked her, hard enough to bring a flinch from Tsunade. By now, she was crazy mad-and Itachi was her target. Tsunade knew her arms were pinned down, and she was at a huge disadvantage-big enough for her to consider giving up. But hey, Itachi seemed to hate being bitten, so…

Shizune sprang forward, needles blazing. Itachi swore; he knew she was coming, and it was either take the hit, or give up Tsunade. And maybe it was better to-

Itachi substituted at the last second, leaving Shizune with a log. He leaped from treetop to treetop, knowing Tsunade was after him now. He had to get to Kakashi and declare-

_Shit._

Itachi saw the flurry of needles headed towards him and ducked behind a tree, watching them whiz past him, dangerously close. A warning, perhaps? Well, he had given one to the Hokage herself, and he had told her in Tsukiyomi-

_Don't interfere. If you do, we will kill you. Kakashi is mine, and there is nothing you can do about it. And do not interfere. _He had stabbed her again, just to prove his point. _Or else._

**A/N: I felt like it. No flames, my fire demon is more than ready to eat them…**


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Tsunade pushed herself to her feet, watching as Shizune shot the last of her needles at Itachi, chasing the missing-nin out of her room. Shizune sighed and slid her sleeve down again, turning back to Tsunade.

"Tsunade-sama, are you all right?"

Tsunade shook her head and collapsed to her knees again, panting.

"What did he do…?"

"Tsukiyomi," Tsunade said softly. "In which Itachi can do virtually anything to his victim. In this case, I was tied to a cross and stabbed for three days."

Shizune crouched down next to Tsunade and put her arm around the Hokage's waist, gently lifting her up and setting her down in her bed a few feet away.

"I'm sleeping next to you for a little while," she said, and lay down next to Tsunade.

Tsunade was already asleep.

OOOOOOOOO

Kisame was just about fed up with Kakashi. The jounin had kicked him twice in the groin and six times in the shins. Kisame had sworn at him and slapped him many times for it, and Kakashi's face was now streaked with blood from where Kisame had created small lacerations. Kakashi was still fighting viciously, possibly in a blind panic.

"Kisame, stop it."

Kisame halted abruptly mid-blow, fist half an inch from Kakashi's face. The frightened jounin slid back a bit farther, as far as Kisame's hold on his wrist would allow. Itachi stood in front of him, tall and menacing, features relaxed and somewhat bored.

"Let him go."

Kisame slowly lowered his fist. "Huh? But he'll break-"

"I'll worry about him," Itachi said softly. "Just let go of him."

Kisame's hold loosened on Kakashi's wrist, and he leaped back-

Directly into Itachi's arms.

Itachi wrapped his arms around the trembling ninja, gently stroking his hair and trying to quiet him down.

"It's okay, be quiet now," Itachi murmured. "I'm not going to hurt you, I don't know why you're so upset."

Kakashi shook his head and just stood still. He didn't know what to make of the new situation; was Itachi really the enemy? He was treating him nicely, and Kakashi was inclined to trust him over Kisame. All the shark man had done so far was spit and swear at him…maybe he could trust Itachi to keep Kisame from hurting him, but it didn't mean that Itachi wouldn't.

Itachi's hands were gentle on Kakashi's abused body as he was slowly lifted and carried away.

Kisame shook himself and followed, thoroughly confused.

OOOOOOOOO

Asuma woke up slowly, waiting for Kurenai. He knew she was a light sleeper…she would probably wake up when he did, simply because he moved around when he was awake. Sure enough, the kuniochi opened her eyes immediately.

"Morning," Asuma greeted, watching as Kurenai stretched.

"Morning," Kurenai said. "Oh, wow, it's late."

"It's only nine," Asuma said, shrugging. "It's not that late."

Kurenai yawned and threw her feet over the side of the bed, pushing back the light blue covers. "Coming?"

Asuma nodded and stood up, yawning as well. "What are you doing today?"

"Probably just training," Kurenai replied. "I'll definitely visit Kakashi at some point in time today."

Asuma nodded. "Same. Chouji could use some tank time."

Kurenai smiled. "Yeah, just a little rusty around the edges?"

Asuma nodded again and proceeded to the bathroom. "Brush your hair and we'll switch."

Kurenai walked over to the dresser and mirror across from the bathroom door and picked up the hairbrush lying on the top of it. A few fine black hairs were still caught in the teeth, and the faint scent of Kurenai's shampoo lingered in it. Kurenai began combing out her thick black hair, and Asuma walked into the bathroom to brush his teeth. This was their routine; Kurenai would fuss with her hair and dress while Asuma used the bathroom, and then they would switch.

Fifteen minutes later, Asuma emerged from the bathroom looking refreshed and slightly wet from splashing himself in the face to wake up. Kurenai smiled, and they changed rooms without a word.

It only took Kurenai ten minutes in the bathroom; she had showered last night, unlike Asuma. When she came out of the bathroom, Asuma was sitting at the table sipping from a mug of steaming coffee and skimming a newspaper. Kurenai immediately went to the refrigerator and pulled out a jug of milk, set it on the table, and found a clean bowl and spoon in the cabinets. She then went to the pantry and found some cereal to eat, poured it into the bowl, and filled the bowl halfway with milk. It was then that Kurenai noticed the bagel sitting on a plate next to Asuma, half-eaten.

"Mind if I dig around for the comics?"

"Right here."

Asuma handed her a section of the paper, and Kurenai opened it to the comics page. They both finished their breakfasts quietly, still a bit sleepy from just waking up.

Finally, Asuma put down his empty coffee mug and the paper and stood up, clearing his plate and other dishes from the table.

"Ready to go?" Kurenai nodded and swallowed the last of her own breakfast.

"Let's go."

OOOOOOOOO

Itachi brought Kakashi into his own bedroom and laid him down on his bed, letting the jounin curl up as far away from him as possible.

"Oh, what do you think I'm going to do to you?" Itachi asked exasperatedly, reaching over and pulling Kakashi into his lap. "Why would I want to hurt you?"

Kakashi recoiled as far as Itachi would allow. "I don't know," he whispered. "But you did."

Itachi sighed. "Come on, at least stop pulling away."

Kakashi's voice was shaking, whether from fear or anger Itachi didn't know. "Why?"

Itachi sighed again and lifted Kakashi's upper body until it was resting against his shoulder.

"Because."

Kakashi's exhale was so small Itachi barely heard it. But it was still there, and it was still a sign of distress, and Itachi wanted to remove it.

"What's wrong?"

Kakashi didn't answer.

"Come on, you can answer me." Itachi slid two fingers under Kakashi's chin and gently lifted his face. "It's okay, I don't care what you say. I won't hit you like Kisame did."

To Kakashi, this sounded tempting. Timid as he was, he was starting to…_trust _Itachi. Just to keep Kisame from beating him bloody and senseless. But until Kakashi could trust someone else…

He curled up in Itachi's lap and fell asleep.

OOOOOOOOO

Itachi couldn't help the astonishment when Kakashi willing fell asleep in his lap. The Copy Ninja; the legend of Konoha, blood of the White Fang-

Oh, whom was he kidding? The jounin was severely traumatized, and just wanted someone to trust, a stable environment-something to keep him grounded. And if Itachi was that thing, that was fine with him. If Kakashi accepted him, that was fine, too. Itachi's hands slowly traveled over the sleeping jounin's body; he was so perfect, in every way…Itachi wanted him-

"Uchiha; you in here?"

"Shush, Kisame, he's sleeping."

Kisame looked surprised that Itachi cared enough about Kakashi to let him sleep uninterrupted.

"What's so special about-whoa…" Kisame pushed open the door and walked in, and, upon seeing Itachi with Kakashi in his lap, stopped dead.

"Who are you and what have you done with Itachi?"

Itachi sighed. "It's me, you dope. Want me to prove it?" The Mangekyou sparked on Itachi's pupils, and Kisame gulped and slid back.

"No…thanks…I'll keep my sanity."

"Then get me something to clean him up with," Itachi snapped. "He's got blood all over him, no thanks to you. When he wakes up don't even touch him; just let him use the shower and all. I'll take care of him, just don't…don't get involved."

Kisame sighed. "Whatever. But if he provokes me, I won't be held responsible for anything I do to him. So keep him away from me. Little squirt could use a spanking."

Itachi's eyes flashed, and he glared menacingly at Kisame. "If you so much as-"

"Oh, Itachi, I get it," he moaned. "But he does need discipline."

Itachi's glare increased. "Get out."

Kisame wasn't about to argue.

OOOOOOOOO

Tsunade was not in good shape; Shizune decided to keep her home for a day or two and just tell people Tsunade had a stomach bug and didn't want to get anyone else sick. She and Tsunade had talked it over and agreed to it; Tsunade was sick and tired, and she was stressed from Tsukiyomi. She was strong though; very strong, and Shizune knew she would be fine in a day or so. Now, Shizune carried a tray of tea up the stairs to Tsunade's room. She had told the sannin to sleep, and that she could handle anything that came her way. And if she couldn't, which probably wouldn't happen, she could always get the person to come back another time or, if it was an emergency, to get Tsunade or help from the medical team in the hospital. Tsunade had finally agreed, knowing she really should stay home for a day or two.

"Tsunade-sama, may I come in?"

"Hai."

Shizune gently pushed open the door with her foot, Tonton running over at the last minute and helping her nudge it aside. Shizune smiled; Tonton was cute.

"I brought you some tea," she started, walking over to Tsunade's bedside. The sannin was sitting, legs crossed, as she sketched a sunset.

"I didn't know you could draw," Shizune commented, sitting down next to her on the bed.

"Neither could I," Tsunade replied wryly as she smudged a line. "I just found this and…started…"

Shizune smiled and set the tray down on the small table next to Tsunade's bed. "Do you want some?"

"Chamomile?"

"Of course."

"Yes, please."

Shizune poured the tea into two cups and handed one to Tsunade. "I made it a few minutes ago…it's fresh."

"Thank you," Tsunade whispered, and took a slow sip from the cup. "This is really good…"

Shizune blushed at the praise. "Thanks," she said. "Tonton, want some?"

"Bweh…" The pig cocked his head curiously.

"It's chamomile tea," Shizune said, offering the pig a wet finger. "Lick it and see if you like it."

Tonton hesitantly licked off Shizune's finger, tasting the tea. His eyes lit up, and he shoved his nose into Shizune's cup.

"Well, there goes my tea," Shizune said, smiling. "It's okay, I brought an extra cup."

Tsunade smiled. "I think I can go back to work tomorrow," she said. "It's amazing how much a bit of extra sleep can do."

Shizune nodded. "Sleep is the body's way of regenerating. Technically, you are doing the same thing with Genesis Resurrection."

Tsunade nodded. "Yeah…well, I'm going to sleep a little more. I'll be back in the morning."

Shizune took Tsunade's empty teacup and set it on the tray, picking up Tonton's as she passed. "I'll see you in the morning, then. Call me if you need me."

Tsunade set her drawing aside and turned over. Shizune softly closed the door behind her, leaving Tsunade to sleep.

**A/N: Nothing…I'm just bored…review please…no flames...my fire demon is already cranky...**


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Kakashi woke up to Itachi's face.

The jounin gasped and skittered backwards, obviously afraid of what Itachi could do to him. Itachi sighed and reached over, hooking his hands behind Kakashi's back and pulling him close again. Kakashi gave a small mewl of terror when Itachi pulled him close, and cowered before the missing-nin.

"Oh, _what _do you think I'm going to do to you?" Itachi huffed, exasperated. Kakashi shrank back as far as Itachi's hold would allow.

"I-I'm sorry," he stammered, pulling away. "B-But…why are you angry with me? Did I do something?"

Itachi sighed and carefully lifted Kakashi into his lap. "No, you didn't do anything. I'm not angry with you."

Kakashi looked surprised, and he pulled back to look Itachi in the face. "W-What are you-?"

Itachi pulled him close again and set his hands in Kakashi's hair. "I'm not going to hurt you, if that's what you want to know."

Kakashi felt Itachi's hands running over his body, and held stock still, trying to figure out Itachi's intentions. Itachi noticed the change and stopped stroking Kakashi's hair.

"What?"

Kakashi suddenly jumped into his arms, shoving Itachi's legs apart and slipping between them to get closer to Itachi's body. Kakashi buried his face in the curve of Itachi's neck and his hands went to Itachi's shoulders, clutching desperately. Itachi groaned at the sudden pain in his groin, but otherwise ignored it and wrapped his arms around Kakashi's shaking form.

"Shhhhhh, what's wrong?" he asked, stroking Kakashi again. The jounin continued to shake, and Itachi gently kissed his forehead. "What?"

Kakashi shook his head and Itachi exhaled and continued stroking Kakashi. "Can you tell me what happened? What's got you so upset?"

Kakashi's trembling dramatically increased, but he managed to force out, "Kisame."

Itachi's eyes narrowed. "What did he do to you?" he growled, voice husky with anger.

Kakashi sounded distressed, and he pulled away at Itachi's words. "Please don't be angry with me," he pleaded, looking into Itachi's eyes with tear-filled gray orbs. "I didn't want him to even come in, but he told me he was going to hurt me if I did anything wrong…I didn't know what to do, so I just did what he told me to."

"In other words, he forced you to be a sex toy?"

"No, no!" Kakashi cried. "No, he just…he told me he didn't want to see me, and that I should just stay in here until he wanted me."

Itachi exhaled and pulled Kakashi back into his arms. "Sh, it's okay. I'm not angry…with you."

Kakashi seemed comforted by Itachi's words, and slipped back into his embrace. "Thank you, Itachi-sama."

"Itachi-_sama?" _Itachi repeated. "Who do you think you're talking to, Orochimaru? Just my name is fine!"

"I-I'm sorry," Kakashi whispered. "I didn't know-"

"Kakashi, you don't have to apologize for every little thing you do," Itachi said dryly. "I don't care what you say or do. I won't hurt you if you say something wrong, or if you do something I didn't want you to. I understand."

"Thank you, Itachi."

"See? Isn't that better?" Itachi caressed Kakashi's form, running his hands over the broken ninja's back. "You okay?"

Kakashi nodded, and Itachi held him close. "Good. Are you hungry?"

Kakashi shrugged. "I wouldn't mind something to eat…"

"Okay, then, come with me."

Kakashi followed, realizing as he moved that his jounin vest was gone. _They must know about my scrolls…_Itachi motioned towards an empty chair at the table and went to the stove. "I just made myself lunch," he said, "So there's a bit leftover. It's just plain ramen; that okay?"

Kakashi nodded and took the bowl and chopsticks Itachi handed him. "Thank you," he murmured, and began to eat quietly. He never said a word, and Itachi sat down, absently chewing on the side of an apple. "You want one?" he asked. Kakashi shook his head and took another bite of ramen. Itachi noticed that Kakashi would only eat when he was certain no one was looking. Itachi had tried to catch a glimpse of the Copy Ninja's face through his black bangs, but Kakashi would give him a "please look away" look, and Itachi would look away. He didn't want to deny Kakashi the right to eat.

Wait, what was he thinking? He wasn't supposed to care if his little prisoner died or not! He wasn't supposed to care what happened to what the Akatsuki thought of as slaves and trash. He wasn't supposed to care-!

"But you do," Kisame had taunted him. And Itachi had backhanded him for that. But it didn't smack away the fact that he cared about Kakashi.

"Itachi…?"

Itachi swallowed the last bite of his apple and tossed the core into the trashcan. "What?"

"What would you do if…if I asked you to let me go home?"

Itachi shrugged. "I probably can't let you," he said slowly. "Kakuza gave me strict orders-"

"But…would you…" Kakashi swallowed hard, trying to swallow his fear. "Would you…"

"Would I what?" Itachi asked, standing up and taking Kakashi's empty ramen bowl and putting it into the sink. "Come on, you can talk to me."

"W-Would you hurt me?"

Itachi sighed. "Haven't we been over this?" he asked, walking back over to Kakashi. "I would never, if it cost me my life, hurt you in any way."

Kakashi nodded. "Thank you…how can I ever repay you?"

"You can keep your mouth shut about what I'm about to do."

Kakashi looked frightened as Itachi pulled out a scroll from his kunai pouch. He handed it to Kakashi, grinning. "I believe this belongs to you."

Kakashi's muscles slowly relaxed, and he took the scroll from Itachi, turning it and examining it. "It is," he said, shocked.

Itachi smiled and ran his hands through Kakashi's hair. "Use it wisely. And you know what I mean."

OOOOOOOO

Kurenai surveyed her team; shy Hinata, standing behind Shino, Kiba and Akamaru, ready to go, and passive Shino, just kind of standing around.

Kiba set Akamaru down and looked at Kurenai. "So, what are we doing today?"

"Just brushing up on basics," Kurenai said. "You've all been working really hard, so I want to take it a little easy today."

"Thanks," Shino said. Kurenai tossed each member of her team a kunai.

"Pick a tree, and up you go."

OOOOOOOOO

Asuma saw Chouji running up to them, and then Ino walking calmly, pushing Shikamaru in front of her, and smiled. They were the same as ever, really; lazy Shikamaru, preppy Ino, and Chouji…well, Chouji was fine as long as he could eat.

"Just a spar today," Asuma informed the team as they clustered around him. "Nothing too special."

"Hey, how's Kakashi?" Ino asked, finished pushing Shikamaru. "I heard he was really hurt-"

"He's okay," Asuma said. "Tsunade is going to release him from the hospital in a few days. The only thing she's worried about is the trauma."

"That's good," Ino said.

"Wait, wait," Chouji said. "What's trauma?"

"It's when someone…is deeply affected by a experience they had, for the negative, and their survival instincts kick in. Kakashi's gonna be a little flighty for a while, but he'll be fine."

Ino didn't look convinced. "Kakashi? What could ever faze him?"

Asuma sighed. "So you can imagine what he went through. And he did it for Leaf."

Shikamaru's attention was caught. "Whoa-Kakashi's in every bingo book in the known world. Orochimaru had trouble with him, and even Itachi was taking a little longer than usual with him. And he's…traumatized?"

"Yikes," Chouji said. "I once went on a joint team mission with Kakashi. He scares me."

Ino rolled her eyes and heaved a sigh. "Chouji, a lot of things scare you."

"Whatever. And Ino-"

"Hey, hey," Asuma said quickly. "No fighting, please. Ino, you're first up. Strike to kill, or you won't stand a chance."

OOOOOOOOO

Tsunade woke up and stretched. A day off had felt good, but she had to get back to work now. No doubt Konohamaru had set booby traps for her in the Tower, and Kakashi was probably in a mood because she couldn't let him out just yet. Sighing, the Godaime stood up and picked up Tonton.

"Find Shizune and eat," she told the piglet. "Don't bug me until I've had my coffee."

Tonton squealed and ran out of Tsunade's room, more than ready for breakfast. Tsunade headed into the bathroom, combed her hair, brushed her teeth, and went to the bathroom. She came out dripping from the cold water she had splashed over her face, and Shizune was smiling.

"Good news," she said. "Tonton didn't pee on anything overnight!"

"Awesome," Tsunade said. "And the stats at the hospital?"

"One problem."

Tsunade noticed Shizune's face fell when she said this, and she stepped closer, staring her assistant down. "What happened?"

Shizune bit her lower lip.

"Kakashi's missing."

Tsunade groaned and threw her hands up. "I have had it with that brat!" she howled. Seeing Shizune's face again, though, she stopped and asked, "There's more…isn't there…?"

"We found blood where he was sleeping and…it's Uchiha Itachi's."

Tsunade gasped. "So…he came back…because Kakashi knew too much…he wanted to shut his mouth…"

"We have to do something," Shizune said. "If we don't, Kakashi could end up-"

"Second time…" Tsunade murmured. "Have we received any demands yet?"

"No," Shizune replied. "No one has sent us anything…but Kakashi was smart. He must have scratched himself or Itachi, and there's a trail of blood. I sent the ANBU to follow it as soon as I found it to avoid losing the trail. Whoever was taking Kakashi with him or her wasn't very smart; they didn't notice they were bleeding."

Tsunade nodded. "So it wasn't Itachi…so Itachi and someone else. For sake of argument, let's assume it was Kisame. I know he's not smart, and he probably wouldn't notice a superficial scratch, maybe from…Kakashi's nails?"

Shizune nodded. "Like I said before, I have an entire ANBU squad on it, and I have a chakra signature map. I was going to wake you up and we could go, but I guess you're up already."

Tsunade nodded. "Meet me downstairs; I'm getting dressed."

Shizune nodded and went downstairs, carrying Tonton in her arms. Tsunade sighed and rooted around in her armor closet.

"This is my last resort…"

**A/N: Haha, I'm so mean, leaving you with a cliffy! Oh well. If you want to see what happens, you're going to have to review! **


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Tsunade pulled the bag from beneath her armor and loosened the ties, dropping out a blue necklace. It was a crystal shape hanging from a black piece of leather with two steel beads hanging from it.

_Uncle…forgive me…_

Tsunade slid the necklace over her head, pulling the old green one off. Next, she pulled her armor from her closet; the Hokage's armor, female form: a black chakra-enforced shell, with shuriken holsters on the hip and thigh pieces and fishnet over the wrists and ankles. A silver vest went over that, much like the ANBU one, but this one had the Hokage symbol painted on the back. Tsunade put her necklace under her shirt; a hidden weapon of sorts. There were tow katanas in the closet as well; one had belonged to Tsunade's grandfather, the other to his brother. These she crossed on her back, along with the red ribbons trailing from them, and slid the sheaths into the loops on the armor. Tsunade found a Leaf hiata-ait in the closet, picked it up, and tied it around her neck.

"Show time."

OOOOOOOOO

Kakashi looked up as the door opened.

Itachi walked through, carrying a headband. Kakashi recognized it as his; the Leaf symbol, the small scratch along the edge-

"Here."

Kakashi hesitantly took the hiata-ait from Itachi, staring at him fixedly as he did so.

"How did you-?"

Itachi shook his head. "You," he started, sliding his hands around Kakashi's back, "Have no need to know."

Kakashi shrugged Itachi off, but the missing-nin reached for him. "Get back here," he said teasingly, and forced Kakashi to look at him.

"I do have one favor to ask from you."

Kakashi shrank back. This had happened to him before-the enemy would let him go, but only for a heavy price. And usually it was fulfilling a certain satanic pleasure.

Itachi's hands were on his mask now, and Kakashi was frozen with fear now. What would he do? Would this happen again? What did Itachi want? Would he stop at-?

Kakashi felt a cold wave of air hit his face as his mask was stripped away, and he yanked back, covering his face with his hands. Itachi slowly reached out and eased them down, revealing Kakashi's face.

Kakashi's face was absolutely gorgeous to Itachi; the perfection marred only by a vertical scar that crossed his bared left eye. Skin so white it almost reflected a bit of the light in the room. A petite, upturned nose centered perfectly in the center of that beautiful face. Deep, gray eye and blood red Sharingan exactly aligned with the rest of Kakashi's face. Those soft pink lips begging to be kissed-

Itachi leaned forward, pressing his lips to Kakashi's. His prisoner was clearly startled; he yanked back, but it was more instinct than reaction. Itachi smirked into Kakashi's mouth; he was as quiet as he had hoped. He could easily manipulate him to do whatever he wanted.

Itachi broke away, but he held Kakashi close to him, even as the jounin tried to pull away again.

"You're wonderful," he murmured, still holding Kakashi's hands in his own. "Sh, it's okay, I'm not going to hurt you."

"What's your definition of 'hurt me'?"

Itachi laughed and stroked Kakashi's hair, pulling his mask back up and watching the fear dance across his eyes. "I mean, the window's unlocked."

OOOOOOOOO

Kisame slammed the door just as Itachi closed the door to Kakashi's room.

"Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh…"

One black eyebrow rose as Kisame's whine dragged out. "What happened now?"

"I just noticed this."

Kisame pulled up his left sleeve, revealing a long scratch across his forearm. "Kakashi gave it to me on the way here."

Itachi just stood for a moment in shock. "Are you trying to get us all killed and/or found by Konohanin…or are you _just that stupid?!"_

"A little bit of both…?"

Itachi sighed. "Great, just great! And I just…! Aw, never mind, just…" Itachi began pacing furiously. "Go tell Kakuza what happened, I'm grabbing Kakashi and getting the hell out of here. Meet me…somewhere, um…where we first met Yuuhi and Sarutobi…I'm taking Kakashi, go!"

Kisame ran out the door again, and Itachi shoved open the door to Kakashi's room.

Kakashi looked startled as Itachi ran up to him, snatched him up into his arms, and broke the glass in the window.

"Climb down. Now. Your little friends, no thanks to Kisame, now know where we are and we have to get out of here-"

Itachi stopped short when he saw the ANBU huddled below the window.

"…Now…"

Kakashi wasted no time. He was half out the window from when Itachi had shoved him and now he jumped with reckless abandon. Several of the ANBU ran forward and caught him as he fell; Kakashi recognized Gai and Asuma even in their ANBU masks as two of the four ANBU who caught him.

"Thanks," he said softly, and Gai set him down on the ground. Asuma wrapped his arms around him protectively and looked up to the window Itachi was looking out of.

"Come out weasel!" Tsunade taunted, seeing Itachi leaning out over the window. "Come on, we have weasel treats!"

Itachi sighed. This was just what he needed, and he had broken the glass. Only one thing to do now…and that was-

Fight.

OOOOOOOOO

Kisame streaked through the halls. From the sound of it, he was too late. The only thing he could do now was rally the entire Akatsuki to fight, but Kakuza would be so flippin' mad…

"Deidara!" he screamed as he ran past the missing-nin. "We're in a bit of a situation!"

Deidara sighed. "Samehada is half-flushed down the toilet again?"

Kisame reddened. "That was Itachi's fault," he mumbled, and continued. "Konoha found us!"

"We're all gonna die."

Hidan sauntered up to Kisame, a sarcastic ring to his voice. "Anyway, what do you want?"

"Konoha found us!" Kisame repeated. "And Itachi's holding them off! We need to help him!"

Hidan shrugged. "This baby does need a workout, and it is for Itachi…" He shrugged again and swung his massive sword over his shoulder. "Why not? It's for Itachi."

He began walking towards Itachi's room, slinging his sword back over his shoulder. Kakuza was walking up to the group as Hidan walked off, grasping his necklace and chanting.

"There he goes again with those stupid rituals," he mumbled, brushing past them. "He won't stop for a while, but once he gets going he'll be all right."

Zetsu shrugged and followed.

"Well, Sasori?" Deidara asked. "Ready to go fight, un?"

Sasori shrugged. "Sure, why not? I've been running low on human puppets lately…a certain Copy Ninja destroyed all mine."

"We just want to capture him, not kill him," Kisame warned. "Itachi was very clear; we can't hurt him under any circumstances. Otherwise _he'll_ hurt _us_."

"Maybe he'll hurt _you," _Deidara said. "But I'm sure if we only give him a few small bruises Itachi will understand."

"Get out! Get out now!!" 

Itachi was running towards him at warp speed, shouting at them to get out.

"It's gonna blow, the whole thing's rigged to explode!" he yelled. "Get out!!"

Kakuza was the first to turn and run, the rest of the Akatsuki hot on his heels. Hidan came running back.

"Start jumping!" he called. "They blocked the exits!"

"This was it," Deidara muttered. "They planned this-all along…"

"They've got us surrounded, but if we fight and run we might make it!" Itachi called. "Get out now!"

"A-ye!!"

Kisame jumped at the high-pitched shriek from Sasori, and noticed a burst of flame shortly before they were all blown back from the force of an explosion.

"Get out the window!" Hidan said. He swung his sword at the window, shattering the glass. "Get out!" he repeated, and shoved Itachi towards the window. Itachi jumped out, praying he would land on some random ANBU and crush him.

His hopes were half granted; his landed on an ANBU, but the man swiftly stabbed-

His clone.

The real Itachi was running away from the battle, using chakra as a full-body shield. He knew he couldn't last long like this, but he valuing speed over anything else.

Another thump sounded from behind him; a quick glance back indicated that Hidan had made it and was now thundering towards him.

"I would say thanks, but I'm not sure for what," Itachi said. "Surviving, I guess."

"What about the Hatake?" Hidan inquired. "He's the one who leaked in the first place!"

"Exactly," Itachi growled. "Which is why we have to shut him up somehow. Last approach didn't work…Tsukiyomi again might break him, but you might have to carry me out of the battle, and that's a risk I'm not willing to take. "I'm expending an enormous amount of chakra as it is, I can't afford the Tsukiyomi, I might break before he does."

Hidan grit his teeth. "Has anyone else made it?"

Itachi glanced back again. "Sasori and Deidara are back to back fighting, I can't see anyone else."

Hidan nodded. "Kakuza?"

Itachi shook his head. "No idea."

Hidan sighed, clutched at his necklace again, and began chanting.

"What are you doing?"

Hidan didn't answer, only kept up his chant. Itachi sighed and kept leaping through the trees, waiting for Hidan to finish.

The missing-nin finished shortly afterwards, setting down his necklace and never saying a word to Itachi. "What's going on?" Itachi asked. Hidan shook his head. "Religion," he said, and Itachi asked no more.

Itachi finally dropped his chakra shield, after they could no longer hear the battle. "Now what?" Hidan asked, slowing to match Itachi's pace.

Itachi sighed. "We wait," he said finally. "There's nothing else we can do."

OOOOOOOOO

Tsunade knew the battle was going well, and also that it was almost over. Even though Sasori, Zetsu and Kisame had split and slipped through her fingers, she had managed to get her hands, or rather, ropes, on Deidara and Kakuza. Itachi and Hidan had disappeared before that battle, and she had held her men back with a soft order. They had waited, and sure enough, the raging fire drove the Akatsuki out of hiding and into her waiting hands. Deidara had gone down fighting hard, and he almost killed one of her ANBU. However, he hadn't, and Tsunade had managed to get some restraints on him before he kicked her in the shins. She had laughed, kicked him back, and went after Kakuza, who backed down relatively quickly once she distracted him with a kunai to Deidara's neck. She had then laughed again, tossed aside the kunai, and stuck out her tongue. Kakuza had flown into a rage and started kicking her until she kicked him over-and laughed some more.

Finally Tsunade and her ninja had stopped laughing and led the Akatsuki members away, back to Konoha and her tower, and shoved them down in a damp cell in the dungeon underneath the Hokage's Tower.

"Neji, if you could do the honors?"

A dark-haired, white-eyed teenager stepped forward, and Deidara could see the Byakugan sparking along the his eyes.

"Aw, come on! Don't be a-!"

"I can do you first," Neji snapped, and Deidara fell silent.

"Good, we have an understanding," he breathed, and shoved his foot into Kakuza's side. "Stand up and don't move."

Kakuza wormed his way into a standing position by pressing himself up against the wall and pushing himself up with his feet. He was struggling due to his bonds, which Tsunade had made extensive.

"Don't move," Neji repeated, and stepped forward, hands glowing with chakra.

"Eight Trigrams: Sixty-four Palms!"

Kakuza felt one after another of his chakra points closing as the Hyuuga hammered him again and again, showing no mercy as he sealed off his chakra. The missing-nin bit his lip until it bled, holding back his strangled cries of pain. He would _not _give them the pleasure of seeing him cry out! He would _not _be that weak! He would _not _be that humiliated!

Neji finally finished sealing his chakra points, and Kakuza sank down the wall, spitting blood.

The same process was repeated with Deidara, and the blonde looked horrible when he finally fell back next to Kakuza.

"I'll wait until you recover from that," Tsunade said tartly, "To interrogate you. Until then, I wouldn't expect much."

Deidara shrugged. "I hear they're nice to you here," he mumbled. "They let you have water more than once a day."

"Funny," Kakuza said dryly. "Well at least we're entertained in here. All I have to do is look at your hair."

"Thanks. Your kind words are doing wonders for my self esteem."

"Oh, you're welcome. I'm good at that, see."

Deidara sighed and let his head fall back. "I can't feel my legs."

"That Hyuuga was nasty."

"He's with that gambling whore of a Hokage-he's gonna be nasty, un!"

Kakuza sighed. "Let's count bricks."

"Let's not."

"Let's wait until we go insane."

"Let's not."

"Let's get the fuck out of here!"

"Yeah! I wish we could!"

"Let's do something."

"Let's not."

**A/N: Haha, Deidara's blonde…. oh, well. Review please, no flames.**


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

"One, two three."

Kakuza stared at the fist Deidara had made, and then looked back at his own flat palm. "Dammit, I lose again."

"Yes, you do," Deidara said. "Paper covers rock."

Kakuza sighed and kicked his feet up against the wall. "I am _so _bored…."

"Ditto, un."

"One…two…three…four…"

"Dude, what are ya doin'?"

"Counting bricks."

Deidara sighed. "Well, better than getting tortured by that Tsunade kid."

The door slammed open.

"Speak of the devil and he will come for you," Kakuza said, swinging his legs around. "I take it you're here for-"

Tsunade placed a hard kick to the side of Kakuza's head. "Well what was that for?!" he sputtered, sitting up.

Tsunade stuck out her tongue.

"I could."

Kakuza sighed. It was going to be a long day…

OOOOOOOOO

Kakashi sat quietly, not really doing anything at the moment. Asuma and Gai had taken him home and let him sleep, but when he woke up, they had left. Kakashi was just bandaging whatever wounds he felt like bandaging, and smearing ointment on a few abrasions, burns, and lacerations. He almost wanted Itachi there, for all it was worth; Itachi had treated him nicely-

A gentle tap on his window caused him to look up.

Itachi was there, leaning on the frame, and Kakashi hesitantly slid it up. Itachi stepped inside, and Kakashi slid back to allow him room.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, before Itachi was crushing him against his chest.

"You're safe," the missing-nin murmured, and Kakashi realized that was the sole reason he was here. "I wasn't sure-"

"I'm okay," Kakashi said quickly, and Itachi released him.

"Don't do that again."

Kakashi smiled a bit underneath his mask, and Itachi gently reached for it. "What, jumping out the window?" Kakashi whispered, and Itachi carefully tugged down the mask.

"Of course," he murmured, tracing the smooth contours of Kakashi's face. "You really had me."

Kakashi shrugged. "And what, you thought jumping was gonna kill me?"

Itachi smiled. "Of course! We were, what…three stories up?"

Kakashi shrugged again, and Itachi thought it was one of the most innocent looks he had ever seen from the Copy Ninja. "You get to a point when you don't really care much anymore," he said quietly, and Itachi pulled him close.

"Retard," he said teasingly. Kakashi was on his guard as Itachi leaned forward-but wait, his hands were on his-

Itachi's lips brushed Kakashi's in a soft, chaste kiss, and Kakashi immediately jerked backwards, startled.

Itachi pulled back, concerned. "What?"

Kakashi shook his head. "N-Nothing…I'm fine."

Itachi didn't look convinced, but he said nothing more on the subject. "Kakashi…"

"I know," Kakashi said bitterly, cutting Itachi off. "And why do you even care? What do you care, about me? Why do you care if I live, or die?"

"You need a reason?" Itachi snapped.

"Yes," Kakashi said hardly. "Yes, I do."

"No you don't. And if you have a problem with me caring about you, brat, I can stop caring at any time, and I will hurt you-"

"No!" Kakashi said quickly. "Please, no. I-I just wanted to see if you were still using me…like you did before..."

"I was never using you, Kakashi," Itachi said, and pulled Kakashi into his chest. "Why would I?"

"Last time…" Kakashi hesitantly started. "Tsukiyomi…"

Itachi sighed. "It's complicated," he said quietly, nuzzling Kakashi's neck. Kakashi felt a slight kiss on his skin, and then sharp canine teeth nipped at his throat again. The jounin pulled away, knowing if he let Itachi go any further he couldn't be stopped.

"Stop it."

Itachi glared at Kakashi, who was backing away. "You want a repeat?"

"No!" Kakashi cried, pulling away even more.

"Then cooperate with me."

"This is what you wanted all along, isn't it?" Kakashi whispered. "I can't believe I ever thought you were-"

"Neither can I."

Itachi turned around slowly, as if mocking the pair of ninja behind him. Asuma and Gai stood in the doorway. It was Gai who had spoken.

"Let him go," he said softly. "And nobody gets hurt."

Itachi glanced at Kakashi, weighing his options. If he tried to fight both jounin at once, and only since it included Gai, he might end up getting a bit more banged up than he was hoping. He could always take a hostage, but the only other person there was Kakashi, and he was probably going to throw a fit if he went after him. He could blow up the whole building, but he might kill himself in the process…and he would also kill Kakashi. He doubted he could run very far, and the only reason he was in this was for the Yuuhi. He thought she would be with Kakashi, but he wasn't, so-

Several shuriken flew towards him, and Itachi dodged them easily. But now he was out of time to think, so he would just have to take Kakashi and make an exchange…but wait, that Sarutobi was the last jinchuuriki they needed! He could use Kakashi for them both!

Itachi whipped around, running full out for Kakashi. The jounin looked stunned and ducked as Itachi reached for him, but Itachi swept him up into his arms and turned, looking around frantically. Window, window, window-gah, where was the stupid thing?!

…No, duh.

Itachi kicked out, breaking the glass. He leaped through, but not before he heard the desperate struggles of Asuma and Gai, trying to win Kakashi back.

Sighing at how stupid they were, Itachi raced off into the trees.

OOOOOOOOO

Gai exhaled and ran a hand through his hair. "What now? I know he's gotten away, so it's fairly pointless to pursue him…"

Asuma sighed. "He wants me. He wants to make an exchange: me for Kakashi."

"The Swallow?"

"Of course."

Asuma sighed again. "I know he's also taken a liking to Kurenai. Why, I have no idea, but it's fairly sudden and it only came about when he had her…"

"Yeah," Gai said. "Okay, I'm going to Tsunade. If you want you can pursue Itachi-"

Asuma shook his head. "No. That's exactly what he wants. It's a trap, of course. Um, a source told me that the Akatsuki has all the jinchuuriki's demons extracted…except mine."

Gai nodded. "Okay, let's go to Tsunade. She'll know what to do…"

OOOOOOOOO

Kakashi's nails were already drawing wicked scratches across Itachi's skin, and he was watching the blood carefully. If Kakashi happened to bite him, the blood flow would increase by too much. And that was not good.

But if Kakashi wanted to be a pain, that was fine. He could always discipline the brat later. But if someone was following him…that was another story. He might have to do something ahead of plans, and that wasn't good either…

_Face it Itachi-the entire situation is not good._

OOOOOOOOO

"_What happened??!!!"_

Asuma sighed. He had known Tsunade wouldn't take this very well, but still…

"Tsunade-sama, please, try to understand-" Gai started.

"No!" Tsunade said, throwing up her hands. "I won't have it! Dear Lord, people think _I'm _drunk!"

Asuma heaved another sigh. There was really only one way to do this…

"Tsunade-sama, if you don't authorize this I'm going in alone."

"Fine!" Tsunade threw up her hands again. "Go get killed! I don't care at this point!"

Asuma grinned. _Score one!_

OOOOOOOOO

Kakashi bit deep into Itachi's flesh again as he threw him into a random cell in the dungeon. "And don't you dare-!"

Kakashi flew at him again, aiming for his vital points and praying for a hit. Itachi slammed the door and used his body to block it until he could bolt it and fasten the chain across the edge. Itachi could feel the door shaking under Kakashi's weight repeatedly being thrown against it and sighed again. The jounin was a beast!

Itachi walked away. All that was left to do was send Konoha a little note, and all would be well…

OOOOOOOOO

"Tsunade-sama! A messenger from the Akatsuki insists upon seeing you immediately!"

Tsunade sighed. "Alright, Shizune let him in. Tight security, and don't let leave him alone at any time!"

Shizune nodded and put down a squealing piglet. Tsunade smiled and let Tonton jump into her lap, then sat back and waited for this messenger.

He entered, hunched over and spitting nails at Shizune and the ANBU trailing him. Tsunade smiled and rose.

"Sasori of the Red Sand, eh? Well, I certainly didn't expect to see you here."

Sasori hissed and flicked his tail impatiently. "We want to make a trade. Our ninja or Yuuhi Kurenai and Sarutobi Asuma, for Kakashi."

"Oh, yeah, like you didn't see that one comin' a mile away," Tsunade muttered under her breath.

"Is there a problem, Tsunade-san?" Sasori purred. "The Akatsuki is offering you a fair deal."

"It's hardly fair!" Tsunade cried.

Sasori shrugged. "Oh, yes, you'll like this last part, then. You see, if our demands are not met in full in five days, the Copy Ninja will die. Or, I can bind him to me, and he will be my slave. And you will decide that as well."

Tsunade felt her jaw drop in shock. "Th-That's…!"

"Life isn't fair, Tsunade-san," Sasori said, and Tsunade swore he was grinning under the piece of cloth over his lower face. "Learn to deal with it. As I said before-you have five days to either release our ninja or hand over Yuuhi Kurenai and Sarutobi Asuma. Your choice." With that, Sasori turned to leave.

"Wait!"

The missing-nin turned back to Tsunade expectantly. "What?"

"Why do you want Kurenai?"

Sasori shrugged. "How should I know? Itachi just wants her. And I'm just following instructions."

And he swept out of Tsunade's office, still giving her that same, damnable smirk.

Tsunade sank down in her chair, covering her face with her hands. "Now what?! I can't just hand over my own ninja, that's just wrong by every moral! And I'm reluctant to release the other Akatsuki, because then they'll…! And if I do nothing, Kakashi will die!"

Shizune let out her exhaled breath. "I can't help you," she said quietly. "The only thing I would suggest would be an attempted rescue, but the chances are low that any good would come of it…Maybe you should just ask Kurenai and Asuma would they think," she said carefully. "And they know Kakashi best too…"

Tsunade nodded. "Would you get them, please?"

Shizune nodded and swept out of the room, the ANBU slowly backing up. Tsunade waved them off, and they disappeared. She covered her face again and leaned forward on her elbows. Why, oh why did this have to happen to her every time?

**A/N: Haha, cliffy! Oh, well…review if you want to know what happens! And sorry for the late update, school and stuff has been crazy!! I had to visit my grandparents', then I had to visit my uncle, and then…aw, you don't care. If you got the end of this without being bored and stopping, thank you and chocolate chip cookies. If you didn't…I don't care either. REVIEW PLEASE!!!!!!!!**


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Kakashi's motion finally stilled; he had worn himself out, despite knowing all his efforts were futile. Blood ran down his face from where he had created lacerations and abrasions, and bruises covered his body.

"Finally given up?"

Kakashi started at Itachi's voice and tried to back away, failing in the weakness of his own body. Itachi crouched down in front of him, hand flashing out and snatching Kakashi's.

"Quiet. I'm not in the mood to fight with you."

Kakashi yanked back, but to no avail. Itachi's tight grip only became tighter, and Kakashi whimpered at the loss of circulation in his hand.

"See? I'll break it."

Kakashi bit his lip, fighting a cry of pain as Itachi twisted his wrist harshly to the side. He could feel blood trickling down his face, and Itachi released his hand.

"I told you."

"But it's not actually broken," Kakashi whispered. Itachi laughed and straightened. "You're absolutely pathetic." And he delivered a hard kick to Kakashi's bleeding side. The jounin yelped in surprise and pain, skidding back as far as Itachi's kick had forced him.

"What was that for? What did I ever do to deserve this?"

"Don't be naïve. Cute as you are, I hate stupid people."

Kakashi lowered his head. In truth, he hadn't done anything, and he and Itachi both knew it. The problem was, Itachi was just a sadist and truly enjoyed seeing him so miserable.

"I really should have tied you down," he murmured, tracking back to Kakashi. By now, Kakashi's survival instincts were starting to kick in, and he slipped back, trying to evade Itachi.

"That would have been so beautiful…"

"Leave him alone."

Itachi whipped around. Hidan was standing there, and now he walked over to Kakashi and gently picked him up. "He's having a rough time, he doesn't need you to make it worse."

Kakashi settled against Hidan's chest, hearing the missing-nin's heart beating softly in his chest. Hidan's strong arms wrapped around Kakashi's trembling form, and he held him close as he carried him out of the room.

"He's mine now."

OOOOOOOOO

Tsunade was pacing. Only four more days until the Akatsuki sent Kakashi to his end…she had yet to go to Kurenai and Asuma, but she had been planning on going today…

"Tsunade-sama!"

Kurenai slammed the door open and stood panting for a moment before she gasped, "I came as soon as I heard. Asuma's-"

"Right here."

Asuma stepped around Kurenai and said, "We'll go. It'll be a trap. We get all these ANBU hiding in the trees, we meet, we get Kakashi, we go, and then –Bam!- they're all dead."

"Well, I don't have anything better, and I doubt I can come up with anything in three days…" Tsunade said slowly. "Alright, we'll do it."

OOOOOOOOO

Hidan set Kakashi down in the bathroom and reached underneath the sink for some bandages. He emerged triumphant and began carefully cleaning out Kakashi's wounds.

"You okay?"

Kakashi shook his head, not bothering to speak. He flinched as Hidan neared his bruised, sprained wrist, and yelped in pain as he touched it. Hidan released him quickly, and Kakashi pulled his hand back into his stomach.

"What? Is it broken?"

Kakashi shook his head again and hesitantly extended the wrist again.

"Come on, you can talk, I won't hurt you."

Kakashi simply withdrew again.

Hidan sighed. "I don't want to hurt you, and you know it."

He slowly reached out, trying not to startle Kakashi. The jounin didn't move, so Hidan slowly picked up the horrendously bruised wrist and began gently turning it. "Tell me if I'm hurting you, okay?" Hidan knew Kakashi probably wouldn't, but it was worth a try.

"Stop!"

Hidan immediately let go, seeing Kakashi's face twist with pain. "Ready?"

Kakashi nodded, and Hidan started again on his wrist, sighing. "I don't know what Itachi was thinking," he muttered, wrapping bandages around to protect the wrist. "Abusing you like that."

"Stop trying to make me feel better."

Kakashi sounded so crushed Hidan wanted to hold him forever and comfort him. But he knew Kakashi didn't even want to be touched right now, so he simply extended his arm, offering an embrace and letting Kakashi take it at his own pace. Kakashi only looked confused for a moment, then he realized what Hidan was offering. He slipped into Hidan's arms again, letting Hidan hold him.

"I know your organization is going to kill me in four days."

"Only if Kurenai and Asuma do not come, or Deidara and Kakuza are not returned," Hidan said quickly. "And if they're not, I won't let them hurt you."

"Don't lie to me."

Hidan sighed. "I'm not lying. Relax, I only want to get you out of here as soon as possible."

Kakashi 's exhale was quiet, and Hidan barely felt it against his bare chest. "Fine."

OOOOOOOOOO

"Good news!"

Hidan eased Kakashi off his chest, moving the sleeping jounin to the side and covering him with the blankets. "What?" Hidan grunted, stepping off the side of the bed. Kakashi awoke just then, slipped out of the bed, and walked just behind Hidan to the door, shadowing him all the way.

Sasori stood in the doorway.

"Tsunade has a response. She is sending her own ninja to us."

Hidan gave a curt nod. "When do we cut this one loose?" he asked, motioning to Kakashi. "He's scared shitless and he's totally useless."

Sasori replied, "Whenever Tsunade's ninja get here. She's giving us a location for a tradeoff."

Hidan nodded. "Thanks."

"Well, since you're in charge of him…"

Hidan closed the door as Sasori walked away, and he gently took Kakashi's shoulders to guide him to the bedroom again. "Get some sleep."

Kakashi nodded and lay down quietly; by now he had been with Hidan for three days, and apparently it was enough time for the jounin to grow to trust him. Hidan settled next to him and promptly went back to sleep, Kakashi curled up against his stomach.

OOOOOOOOO

Tsunade exhaled heavily as she watched her ANBU sink into trees, hide behind rocks, melt into different shapes, transform, or otherwise obscure themselves from sight. Tsunade then walked forward and waited for the Akatsuki to appear.

She knew she would be waiting a while.

OOOOOOOOO

Kakashi awoke to Hidan shaking him.

"Come on, wake up…I know you're awake, now get up!"

Kakashi slowly sat up, looking around. Hidan was the only one in the room, and he was standing over him now, trying to wake him up.

"Okay, I'm up," Kakashi said, letting Hidan pull him into his arms.

"Okay, then. Clean yourself up; and do it quickly. Tsunade is waiting for us, and we have to bring you along otherwise the deal's off."

Kakashi nodded, and Hidan handed him his clothes.

"Bathroom's on the right."

OOOOOOOOO

The rustling of leaves brought Tsunade out of her daydream and back to the present world. Sasori stood in front of her, Hidan behind him, and the rest of the Akatsuki behind him.

"The two we requested?"

Asuma and Kurenai stepped forward, in front of Tsunade, and glared at the Akatsuki.

"Kakashi?"

Hidan pushed Kakashi forward, and he fell at Tsunade's feet. The Hokage wordlessly picked him up, and Kurenai glanced up.

"Peanut butter."

Tsunade's trap had been sprung, and Sasori was regretting letting go of Kakashi so soon now. ANBU were everywhere, and Sasori had _not _seen that coming. But he should have…

Now, there wasn't much he could do. He simply had to fight and pray he could make it. Or he could run like a cowardly dog…but he would survive, even if his dignity didn't…

Sasori pulled out a summoning scroll, swept blood across it, and called up his puppets. In the background, he could catch glimpses of Hidan and Kisame reaching for their swords, Zetsu forming a jutsu, and Itachi's Sharingan swirling into existence. Sighing, Sasori pulled out another scroll and summoned those puppets as well, as a certain Copy Ninja had just blown half of his originals to pieces with some weird water jutsu…

There was no way they could survive this. No way in hell. But they had to try, otherwise they couldn't get the jinchuuriki they needed for-

Oh, what the fuck, just run.

OOOOOOOOO

Tsunade saw the Akatsuki trying to retreat, and was stuck with another killer decision-pursue, or let them retreat?

"Go after them!" she called. "Asuma and Kurenai stay here! Kurenai, take Kakashi and go! Asuma, go with her!"

Kurenai nodded, swept Kakashi into her arms, and took off. Asuma shadowed her, pulling his chakra blades out. Wind chakra blazed along the edges, and Asuma charged in front of Kurenai, chopping down branches and vines that were in her way. Tsunade watched them go, and then followed her ANBU after the Akatsuki.

The Akatsuki were very good at fleeing, Tsunade concluded. They were fast, and they hid themselves well. Tsunade herself was having trouble spotting them.

"There! Up ahead!"

A flash of red drew Tsunade's attention, and she dove after it, knowing she may not get another opportunity like this. The ANBU split, trying to get around the Akatsuki and cut them off. Tsunade raised her thumb, bit it, and began forming hand signs.

"Come on out, sluggy…"

OOOOOOOOO

Kurenai panted as she pulled Kakashi after her; she was running too fast with too much weight.

"Asuma, can you take him for me, please?" she called.

Asuma nodded briefly and stopped just ahead of her. Kurenai pulled up behind him and handed Kakashi to Asuma.

"You okay?"

Kurenai nodded. "Don't worry about me, worry about Kakashi. He looks horrible."

"Thanks," Kakashi muttered. "It probably looks worse than it feels."

"I dunno, that looks pretty harsh," Kurenai said. "And that wrist…"

Kakashi shrugged. "It's okay…I guess…"

"Come on, we need to get him to the hospital."

Asuma picked up Kakashi and ran, Kurenai running in front of him to clear the way.

**A/N: That was the worst chapter ever. I'm sorry, everyone! TT**


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Asuma and Kurenai reached Konoha with no problems; at the gates, they went through and immediately went to the hospital, carrying Kakashi all the way. Shizune took them to an empty room and got Kakashi settled and began to see to his wounds as soon as she did.

"This wrist…" she murmured, gently examining the bruising. "It worries me. I'm going to X-ray it, and then if it's broken I'll set it. If not, I'll just heal the bruising and all…"

Kakashi nodded, and Shizune noticed that he was oddly quietly and submissive, especially when she went to touch him. He seemed to shrink back before her touch, and he only seemed to want someone holding him. Shizune walked away for a moment, looking for a lead shield, and Kurenai slipped in next to Kakashi, taking him into her arms to comfort him.

"It's okay, you're safe," she murmured, raising a hand to stroke his hair. Kakashi let her, more passive than caring at the moment. As long as no one was hurting him…Asuma sat down next to her and gently tipped Kakashi's face up to his.

"You'll tell us if you need anything right?"

Kakashi nodded, and Asuma couldn't help but notice how tired and drained he looked. _Looks like me after the Swallow-_

"Alright, everyone out, I have to X-ray this," Shizune said. "And unnecessary X-ray exposure is not good for you two, so out!"

Asuma sighed and stood up. "Come on, Kurenai," he said, stretching. "You wanna go out for lunch?"

"Sure." Kurenai put Kakashi down and stood up as well. "Kakashi, want anything?"

"Where are you going?"

"Probably Ichiraku's," Asuma replied. "The usual?"

"Sure," Kakashi said.

"Want us to come back and eat with you?" Kurenai asked. "That way you can get your food faster and you have company."

"If you want to."

"Okay then," Asuma said. "We'll be back in about half an hour."

Kakashi nodded, and Asuma and Kurenai left the room, leaving Shizune and Kakashi alone.

OOOOOOOOO

"Well, isn't _this _perfect."

Kakashi peeked over Shizune's shoulder at the prints of the X-ray. "It's broken."

"Way to notice," Shizune said dryly. "Yes, it's broken, but the good news is it's only a hairline fracture."

Blank stare.

"It means the bone is only cracked a little."

Kakashi nodded. "So…now what?"

"I could just put it in a cast and you could wait for it to heal naturally, or I could heal it and it would heal faster."

"Faster as in, a couple weeks faster or faster as in a couple hours?"

"Somewhere in the middle," Shizune said. "What I'm really doing is speeding up the cell division process, so the bone should be fully healed in a few days since it's a pretty mild injury."

Kakashi nodded. "Thank you."

"Sure, any time," Shizune said. "You want to heal that now?"

Kakashi shrugged. "Sure, why not?"

"Over there."

Kakashi sat down on the edge of his bed and Shizune washed her hands. "Careful with it for the next few days," she was saying. "If you want I could wrap it in some bandages for the first couple days, and then you just come back and get it checked out, just to make sure everything's okay, and then I can just let you go break it again…"

Kakashi smiled. "Thanks for the vote of confidence."

"Actually, that happened once," Shizune said, rolling up her sleeves. "I healed someone's broken ankle, then they went on a mission the very next day. D-rank; pulling weeds or something. On the way back, he stepped in a ditch, twisted his ankle, and broke it again."

Kakashi laughed. "Tell him I said way to go."

"Oh, Tsunade-sama had a lot to say," Shizune said, laughing. "She yelled at him for a while, while we all laughed, and then she healed him and just let him go."

Kakashi smiled. "Wow, bipolar much?"

"She's not bad," Shizune said, picking up Kakashi's injured wrist. "And hopefully, this won't be either…"

Green chakra glowed around her hands, and Kakashi felt a sting in his arm as bone knit itself back together. Shizune bent over her work, concentrating intensely. Kakashi felt the pain increase, but he tried to keep quiet. Still, the burning, stinging, sensation continued, and a slight whimper escaped his lips.

Shizune stopped, finished with the bone. "Well, that was easy," she said, sounding mildly surprised. "Usually it's a little harder, since people fight…but you were good."

Kakashi merely shrugged, and Shizune _knew _something was up.

"We're back!"

Asuma handed Kakashi a plastic bag and took his food and Kurenai to the small table and two chairs in the corner.

"Miss me?"

Kakashi smiled and nodded. "Of course."

"How'd that go?" Kurenai asked, motioning with one hand to his arm. Kakashi held it up.

"I have to keep off it for a few days, but after that Shizune's just going to check it, make sure it's okay, and then I'm back in business."

Kakashi nodded his thanks again, and Kurenai and Asuma found places to sit around him.

"How are you feeling?" Kakashi shrugged at Asuma's question.

"I don't really know…"

"Just tired and traumatized?" Kurenai asked. Kakashi shrugged again.

"I guess…"

Asuma shrugged, already buried in his bowl of ramen. Kurenai smiled and began to eat as well.

"I'm just going to pick up my own lunch," Shizune said. "I left it in the refrigerator. Mind if I eat in here?"

"Not at all," Asuma said. "Kakashi?"

"Sure." Kakashi was quietly eating for the most part, and he didn't seem to have much to add to the conversation. Shizune nodded and slipped out of the room, heading for the staff lounge. The fridge in there was a good one; hopefully her food was still cold…

When she got to the lounge, her food was still there, and furthermore, still cold. Shizune pulled the bag from the fridge and walked back to Kakashi's room.

"So, what's new?" she asked, sitting down in a chair next to Kurenai. "Any good gossip?"

"Well, I hear Hataru, the kuniochi on my ANBU squad, and that kid from Sand…oh, what was his name…? Kankuro, right! Were going out. Temari and Shikamaru have just announced 'going steady' and Asuma and I are talking about getting married."

"Nice," Shizune said slowly. "We got ourselves a real good week, huh?"

"Oh, the thick romance," Kurenai said absently. "Anyway, how about you, Asuma? Heard anything good?"

Asuma shook his head. "I've got nothing to add at this point. Oh, wait! Gaara, the Kazekage of Sand? Yeah, he's doing all right after that little incident with the Akatsuki, he just wanted to let us know. And he wants to thank us for saving Kankuro."

Shizune nodded. "So how goes the mission record?"

"I'm living," Asuma said wryly. Kurenai tried to laugh and almost choked on her ramen.

"It not that funny!" Asuma exclaimed. "…Is it?"

Kakashi nodded, grinning. Asuma sighed. "Well, at least I'm alive to hear it."

"Not for long."

The entire room fell silent.

"Did he just say something?" Kurenai said quickly. "He never says something."

Kakashi shrugged. "Everything's been fine up to this point…"

"Usually, you have a lot to say," Shizune said dryly. "Anyway, why won't Asuma last?"

"The Akatsuki wants him," Kakashi said, choosing his words carefully. "And that never ends well, as you saw with Gaara."

Asuma glanced at Kurenai. "Right…yeah, good point."

Shizune sighed. "I know about the Swallow."

Asuma sighed. "How?"

Shizune smiled. "I'm the Hokage's second-in-command! I have access to everything she does, including the databases."

Asuma nodded, impressed. "Anyway, what more do you know about this, Kakashi?" he asked, finishing the last of his ramen. Kakashi set his bowl aside, also finished, and began.

"Well, whenever the Akatsuki captures a jinchuuriki, they extract the demon immediately. And, long story short, you are basically tortured to death. When the Akatsuki extracts a demon, it takes three days and nights, nonstop, to pull the demon entirely from the person. They already have…four, I believe, and you would be the fifth, Naruto the sixth, if they catch you both…and then…I don't know from then on, but I do know their final goal is, of course, world domination."

"World domination with a group of a couple loopy guys, half of them not older than Kakashi?" Kurenai asked incrediculously. "I don't really see it."

"Yes, but they are all more powerful than me," Kakashi pointed out. "Age hardly matters, except in brain development, and they have their leader to solve that problem. And all of them are mature enough to do just about anything…keeping Itachi in mind, as he is the youngest at seventeen or eighteen."

Kurenai slowly nodded. "I'm starting to see the whole picture here…"

Asuma glanced at Kakashi. "So how do you know this?"

Kakashi sighed. "No comment. Let's just say…I saw some things, I met a guy-I didn't like him-and I know a few people."

Shizune sighed. "Vague mysterious, and sexy as ever."

Kakashi glanced down. Well, the skin-tight undershirt he was wearing didn't exactly contradict _that_…

"Whatever. Anyway, Asuma isn't ready for that walk in the park, and I don't think any of us are. So, let's bomb the whole thing and laugh as we realize how stupid we are and that they just blew _us _up instead!"

"Wow! Let's not!" Asuma said, falsely enthusiastic. Kurenai smiled.

"No fighting," she said. "Asuma needs to focus on the Swallow, and Kakashi needs to focus on getting better."

Shizune sighed. "And I need to focus on Hokage-sama," she sighed. "I think she's going on a gambling spree."

"Again?"

Kakashi barely stuffed down a snort, and even then it came out a half-strangled noise. Shizune looked at him strangely.

"Are you okay?"

Still grinning underneath the mask, Kakashi nodded hurriedly. He didn't trust his mouth quite yet to open.

Shizune sighed and threw away the remains of her lunch. "Whatever. I know on the inside, you're cracking up. Anyway, I've got stuff to do, and I'm sure you do to. Kakashi, _stay put _or so help me _God _I will get Tsunade to personally rope you, tie you down-"

"I get it."

"Good."

Kakashi turned onto his stomach, turning his face to the side on his pillow. "I don't want to be strangled by that women. She scares me."

"Even though she loves you."

Kakashi sat bolt upright again. "She hates me!"

A sly grin crossed Shizune's face. "So you think…so you think." She turned and walked out, closing the door behind her and completely ignoring the questions from Asuma, Kurenai, and Kakashi in regards to Tsunade's love life.

**A/N: Well, at least this was better than the last chapter…**


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

Kakashi lay in bed for a while, simply contemplating Shizune's comment on how Tsunade loved him. It was very confusing to the jounin: why _would_ Tsunade love him? And if she did love him, she sure had a strange way of showing it…Shizune had insisted on keeping him overnight for observation, and Kakashi was edgy. If Tsunade came in, it would be _very_ awkward…

"Kakashi?"

Kakashi pretended to be asleep. _Speak of the devil and she comes for you…_

"I know you're awake."

Kakashi sighed and sat up. "What?"

Tsunade sat down next to Kakashi and reached out, taking him into her arms in a surprisingly tender embrace. "Talk to me."

"What's there to say?"

But despite his hard, bitter tone, Tsunade could feel Kakashi getting comfortable against her chest. _Heh…maybe he does have a soft spot somewhere…_

"What's wrong?" Tsunade asked. "I know something's wrong, otherwise you'd be…yourself, I guess. But Shizune told me you were…a little off-"

"Stop trying to put things mildly."

Tsunade sighed. "The Akatsuki all got away," she said. "Katsuyu isn't very fast, or good at tracking…but to her credit, she did very well in trying, and I couldn't have asked more of her than to try. As far as I know, Deidara and Kakuza are still somewhere below the Tower, and the rest of them are running back to their hideout."

Kakashi nodded. That much he had gotten from Kurenai and Asuma.

"How do those wounds feel?"

"Shizune healed most of them," Kakashi said softly. Tsunade nodded and picked up Kakashi's broken wrist, and slowly began unwrapping the bandages to check the wrist.

"Tell me what happened."

Kakashi didn't move as Tsunade gently turned is wrist, examining the faint bruises that remained. "Do I have to?"

"Yes."

Kakashi sighed. "How much detail do you want?"

"If you're really uncomfortable, I don't need much," Tsunade said. "But as much as you can give."

Kakashi gave another shuddering sigh and began. "After Itachi took me, he went back to the Akatsuki's hideout and back to his room. He kind of threw me around for a while, telling me to shut up and stay put, he wasn't in the mood to deal with me now. So I tried to get out of his way, but he kicked me again and then he got…really aggressive, how about, and then Hidan came in…he said he heard a lot of noise. He picked me up, took me to his room, and took care of me."

"He cleaned out your wounds, gave you something to eat and drink?"

Kakashi nodded. "Hai…he treated me better than anyone else there…everyone else just tried to kick me."

Tsunade exhaled and pulled Kakashi into her arms again. "You poor thing…"

"I don't need sympathy."

"But you're getting it."

Kakashi exhaled slowly. "I guess I could live."

Tsunade smiled. "I guess you could. You're tough; you've been through worse than this."

Kakashi nodded. "But not so close together…and Itachi…"

Tsunade sighed. "Oh, Itachi…believe it or not, he used to be cute. Should have seen him when he was a little kid-really cute."

"What changed?"

"Well, some of the ladies didn't think anything changed," Tsunade said dryly. "They still thought he was attractive, no matter what name you put to it."

Kakashi smiled. "Yeah, I seem to remember him as an older version of Sasuke…"

"Hey-cute, powerful, and hot? I'd like him."

"Wait until you hear about his personality."

"See, that's what always confused me," Tsunade said slowly. "He had all the attention, but he didn't care. He had such a great life, but he seemed to take it for granted. His parents loved him, but it was like he refused to love…his little brother was such an awesome kid, but he thought of him merely as an annoyance. But Sasuke was the closest to him…and Itachi still hated him. He turned him into what he is today…"

Kakashi shivered. "I don't understand," he whispered. "Itachi…always seemed perfectly fine. He passed every single insanity test he ever took…"

"Yes, but his numbers were going down," Tsunade offered. "He used to pass with flying colors; when he ran away, he was barely passing at all."

An impish grin overtook Kakashi's face. "How about my numbers?"

"Let me tell you something," Tsunade said, slowly and in the dead kind of tone that made Kakashi sometimes wonder if Tsunade was going to kill him. "Ibiki thought you never cared. I always thought you were flat out crazy. And even old man Sarutobi thought you were a little off balance. But you had 'special circumstances' so we let you off the hook when you failed _six tests in a row. _Your numbers have stabilized since, but we still consider you dangerous."

Kakashi couldn't help it; he burst out in laughter and fell over backwards.

"And why is that so funny?!"

Kakashi shook his head. "I have no idea," he gasped, coughing through his spasms of laughing. "God, now I know why you think I'm crazy!"

Tsunade sighed and poked him in the stomach. Kakashi's laughter slowly died down, but he was still coughing.

"Are you okay?"

"Not really."

Tsunade sighed. She had known she couldn't get a straight answer from him, but still…

"Moving on…"

Kakashi sat up, shaking his hair out of his face. "What?"

"Did you get any information of any sort?"

Kakashi thought back. What did he find out…? Anything?

Kakashi snapped back to Tsunade. "Yeah…they've got plans for a bijuu called they kept referring to as Katsu…"

Tsunade's eyes widened. "You're sure it was Katsu?"

Kakashi nodded. "Yeah, they said that they were about to move for it, and that this time there were going to be no mistakes…"

"Oh no…no, no, no…"

"What?"

"Kakashi, stay here! Do not move from this room! I'll be back!"

"But-"

"_Don't move!"_

Kakashi gulped and obeyed.

OOOOOOOOO

Asuma sat on the roof, staring up at the stars. A thin line of smoke rose from his cigarette into the midnight sky, and he was leaning back on his elbows. He was still wearing his jounin uniform, but he didn't especially care. He couldn't sleep anyway.

Movement in the shadows to his left drew his attention sharply.

Asuma jerked his head to the left, targeting the movement, but it was already too late. More movement was behind him, and there was no time to further react. His arms were suddenly twisted up behind his back, he was flipped onto his stomach, and someone's foot was pushing down in the small of his back.

"Oh, look," someone sneered. "We caught a bird by the name of Katsu."

"So, you're after the Swallow," Asuma said. "Well, it certainly is a pleasant surprise to go out for a smoke and end up smoked."

"Ah, yes," Sasori said slowly. "I think I have a flame thrower in here somewhere…"

"_No," _Itachi said firmly. "Four of you take the Swallow and _go. _I'll take the rest of you and get Deidara and Kakuza."

Sasori sighed. "Fine, fine. Kisame, that means you. Zetsu and…Hidan. Itachi, that leaves Tobi. Have fun."

Itachi held up his right hand, making a horrible face as well. Sasori stared at the raised finger, sighed, and turned around. "Let's go."

Itachi and Tobi left quickly, heading for the empty-by-night Hokage's Tower. Tobi seemed to know about Itachi's incredible power, and Itachi seemed to know about what an annoyance Tobi could be. So Tobi kept his mouth shut, and Itachi blocked out everything except the mission.

Hopefully they both could make it to the Tower without killing each other.

OOOOOOOOO

Tsunade bolted for Asuma's apartment, knowing full well that she might already be too late. Let's see…Kurenai was in there as well, so they may have been able to hold them off, but if Asuma was on the roof smoking, as he usually was, it was practically hopeless.

Tsunade rushed down the hallway, stopping at door 198. It was closed, and there was only one chakra signature inside; it was Kurenai's. Tsunade sighed, whipped around, and disappeared in a cloud of smoke. She reappeared on the roof and immediately dropped to her hands and knees, searching for a sign of some sort that Asuma had been here.

It smelled like smoke.

A kunai lay on the ground a short distance from where Tsunade was kneeling, and she reached over and grabbed it, checking quickly for any traps. Finding none, she proceeded to examine the kunai closely, and found a piece of paper wound around it. She yanked it free and opened it.

_Tsunade, I never thought I would say this soon, but it's over. I'm so sorry. It's been great working for you, and I think you're one of the better Kages we've had. But don't tell anyone I said that; I'll get in trouble. : ) Anyway, the Akatsuki are behind this, and it's too late. Tell Kurenai I love her, and I never forgot her as my life slipped away in the form of a bird-demon. Kurenai, I'm so, so sorry…_

Tears stung at Tsunade's eyes, and she shook them from her eyes. Now was not the time. Now, she had to go rescue Asuma, and stop the Akatsuki from removing the demon. Just doing so would kill him, she knew, and it would take three days to do so. But once they started, it was pointless to stop. You would kill the person by attempting to save them…it was so ironic in Tsunade eyes. Another life had slipped through her hands…

Tsunade put her face in her hands and cried.

OOOOOOOOO

Itachi kicked down the door, watching Kakuza's surprised expressions.

"Get up now, we're leaving," Itachi commanded. Deidara glared pointedly at Itachi.

"Oh, come on, you're so pathetic you can't snap these?" Itachi cried, sighing. "I can probably pull them apart with two fingers!"

"Itachi, these chains are thicker than garden hoses," Deidara snapped.

"I'm well aware of that!" Itachi sighed again and picked up the chains. "Fine, I'll do it. Loser."

There was a loud, resounding, _crack! _And the chains fell apart in Kakuza's lap. The Akatsuki leader stood up, stretched himself out, picked up the ends of the chains, and tried his chakra.

"Nothing yet. Damn, it was supposed to have worn off by now…"

Itachi used a short, concise burst of chakra to severe the chains even shorter, and Kakuza and Deidara nodded their thanks.

"Now let's go," Itachi said impatiently. "We don't have all night. Sooner or later that fool of a Hokage is going to realize we're here, and I don't want to be around when she does!"

"Scared of her?" Kakuza taunted. Itachi shivered.

"Not that kind of scared…scared as in, she creeps me out. She's got the muscles of a man…"

"I find that very sexy in a woman, un," Deidara said slowly.

"No one asked you," Itachi muttered. "Now let's _go, _you retards!!"

Deidara sighed. "Whatever, un. But don't mock me for my choice of women."

Itachi shivered again, and Tobi, Deidara, and Kakuza began running for the door. With another shiver, Itachi followed them out.

**A/N: …I got nothing...review please?**


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Kurenai woke up alone.

The smell of smoke was still lingering in the air; Asuma was probably smoking on the roof again, and Kurenai did have the window open. Kurenai reached over and felt the bed next to her; cold. Asuma had been gone a while, otherwise the heat from his body would still be trapped in the covers…

A frantic pounding on her door brought her attention to full focus. Kurenai grabbed a kunai, held it behind her back in case she needed it, and carefully opened the door for-

Tsunade.

"Kurenai! The Akatsuki came and took Asuma! We have to chase them! If they extract the demon-!"

"I know, I know!" Kurenai was already gathering her clothes and throwing them on, snatching up a bra and a pair of clean underwear. "He'll die!"

She ducked into the bathroom, leaving Tsunade standing in the middle of the doorway. A second later, Kurenai emerged again, a hair tie clenched between her teeth and both hands yanking her hair back. She seized the hair tie as she ran, wrapped it around her hair, and bolted out the door, Tsunade following her. Kurenai knew that now it was a deadly race; a race against time and the Akatsuki, but even more so…

For Asuma.

Kurenai shoved open the window, jumped out, and went up to the roof. She was tracing the Akatsuki from where they had started, knowing that if she could figure out where they were going, she could take a shortcut and cut them off.

"Shortcuts don't work."

Kurenai shook her head. "We have to try!"

"They have a plant-man as their spy!" Tsunade argued as they began to run. "He can teleport through trees and ground. If he thinks there's an enemy, he can go there immediately to check. He is the only Akatsuki member who can move his body during the sealing ritual, and from what I hear he's not exactly a puppy dog in battle."

"So we have to split up," Kurenai reasoned. He can only go after one of us at a time."

Tsunade shrugged. "What I'm worried about is being on our own. We are twice as powerful together, and our skills compliment each other nicely. So if we split up, we're at half power."

"It's our only chance for Asuma!" Kurenai cried.

"If we die he has no chance!" Tsunade screamed angrily. "What we need is more shinobi!"

"Somebody call me?"

Kakashi rose up next to them, looking smug. "Itachi dropped a line and ran, so I came up and waited for you."

"Itachi?" Tsunade asked curiously.

"Don't ask," Kakashi said grimly. "The bastard…him and bondage."

Tsunade got the picture and nodded. She brushed up against Kakashi, passing a large, green spark. Kakashi wordlessly nodded his thanks and sped up.

"Let's go, slowpokes!" he called over his shoulder. "Pakkun has the scent and he is far ahead!"

A slow smile crept across Kurenai's face. Maybe, just maybe, Asuma did stand a chance…

Tsunade began to match Kakashi's speed, so Kurenai sped up as well. The three ninja made their way silently through the night, watching the skies for any sign of attack. Kakashi waited for his dogs' next signal, and Tsunade scanned the forest for signs of the Akatsuki. Kakashi was on edge; he hadn't heard from his dogs in a while…

"Kakashi."

Kakashi glanced down; Pakkun was galloping next to him, looking excited. "We found them! Kitsune is tailing, but we have to go _now!"_

"Never mind."

Another dog ran up to Kakashi and gently licked his hand. "They just entered the lair. It's sealed."

"So?"

All eyes turned to Kurenai. "What, it's a false entrance. You can't tell that's genjutsu?"

"If I had the Sharingan I probably could have," Kakashi said slowly. Tsunade shook her head.

"I'm not a genjutsu type."

Kurenai shrugged. "This way!"

Kakashi and Tsunade followed her, trusting in Kurenai's ability to find the true entrance to the Akatsuki lair. Kurenai dropped low to the ground, darting back and forth into and around bushes and trees. Tsunade and Kakashi tried their best to keep up with her, but it was hard, sometimes impossible to see where she was. Kakashi was thoroughly confused by the time Kurenai swept under a wooden archway and into the Akatsuki lair.

Kakashi was impressed.

Tsunade thought that whoever had gotten in the first jutsu on Asuma was really in for it.

Kurenai held up a hand and began creeping along the wall. Kakashi saw that she was headed for a door set into the stone at the other end of the room. Kitsune, a German Shepherd of Kakashi's, followed her, fur standing on end and hackles raised. Kakashi held her back with a soft order.

As Kurenai neared the other wall, she was moving even more slowly, and occasionally moving away from the wall, probably to avoid traps. Kakashi watched as she cracked the door, staring in to see what was happening. After a moment, she opened it more widely and motioned to everyone else to join her. Tsunade and Kakashi made their way around traps to stand next to Kakashi at the door. Kakashi listened hard, relying on his dogs' hearing to help him.

"Chanting," he said slowly. "And…it sounds like…"

"The demon," Tsunade whispered. "It's half out…already? And God, it sounds angry-"

Kurenai nodded. "The Swallow is easily angered; that's why Asuma doesn't like using his Flying Swallow. It brings out the worse side of the Swallow; by the way, her name is Katsu-"

"A female demon sealed inside a guy?" Kakashi questioned. "That's…a little…"

"Off, I know," Kurenai said quickly. "But we still have Asuma to get to!"

Tsunade nodded. "Through this room and then the statue-_Kurenai_!!"

Kurenai had recklessly charged ahead, unable to withstand the shrieks of rage from the demon and the cries of pain from Asuma any longer. Tsunade sighed and charged after her, knowing Kakashi was right behind her. Kurenai kicked down the door and began forming hand signs immediately.

"Genjutsu: Eternal Darkness!"

The entire room was instantly plunged into darkness for the Akatsuki. Tsunade ran forward, fists flying, and Kakashi's Raikiri blazing. Tsunade knocked Hidan off his perch on the statue of the God of Hell and simply kept going, intending to pull Asuma out of the deadly chakra enveloping him.

"Tsunade, don't touch that!" Kakashi called, still charging with his Raikiri. "I break, you get inside, grab Asuma, and get the hell out of there!"

Tsunade nodded and fell into step behind Kakashi, feeling the aura of the Swallow heating up the air. Beads of sweat began forming on her skin and dripping down into the small of her back. Kakashi's Raikiri wasn't exactly helping that...

"Genjutsu: Tree Bind Death!"

Tsunade glanced up briefly at the statue: Kurenai had just sealed off its mouth, halting the flow of the demon's essence. But then…what about the other half of it…?

Kakashi broke the shell over the Swallow and Asuma, spilling the demon out over the Akatsuki.

_Fools!! Who has stupidly tried to disturb my rest?!_

Three fingers pointed to the Akatsuki. The demon began to reform, yellow splotches of chakra coming together and reforming.

_Heal him! _The demon ordered, and Tsunade crouched down by Asuma's inert form. _If he dies, so do I!_

Tsunade drew up palm full of green chakra and immediately pressed it to Asuma's chest. The Swallow was still pulling itself back together, hovering over Asuma's form.

_Little Yuuhi brat-unseal the statue. I need the other half of me._

If it hadn't been so serious a situation, she might have laughed; the Swallow was missing her tail, a leg, a wing, and half of her beak. Many feathers were missing as well, but Kurenai could still tell that Katsu was a magnificent creature-when she was covered in her golden feathers.

Kurenai released the tree branches, and the rest of Katsu returned at her calling. The bird filled out and began flapping its wings to lower itself to Asuma.

_Well, he certainly is a good host. He tried to save me on the way here, so I helped him-unfortunately, some people know how to ruffle feathers!_

Tsunade was still healing Asuma, Katsu watching. _Well, I suppose I should take care of these asses. But they have gone through so much trouble to run, so I suppose I can get them later…after I help this human. Humans are so fragile…I will never understand how they can't even survive falling off a cliff._

Tsunade smiled and let the demon melt with Asuma, yellow chakra spreading over the man's entire body. Kurenai came trudging back to them, still looking violent.

"They all got away."

_Sucks for you. But be consoled, child-I'll get them all later. Would you like to help?_

A slow smile spread across Kurenai's face. "Why, certainly," she said. The demon's chakra melted away from Asuma, leaving him seemingly unscathed.

He will wake up shortly.

Kurenai nodded her thanks and held Asuma in her lap, staring at his bloodstained face.

"What they must have put him through…"

Tsunade looked on sympathetically as Kurenai began wiping blood from Asuma's face. Kakashi leaned over and lifted the edge of Asuma's shirt, checking for the seal of the Swallow.

"Damn bird…"

Kurenai looked down in shock-Asuma was awake already…!

"I love her," Kurenai mumbled, pressing Asuma' lips to hers. "She saved you, you know."

"But if it wasn't for her, I wouldn't be in this mess to begin with."

"But she got you out of it," Kurenai breathed, and kissed him again. "She redeemed herself."

Asuma smiled and returned the kiss, leaving Tsunade and Kakashi staring at each other.

"Sure, why not?"

Tsunade jumped forward, crushing her lips to Kakashi's and wrapping her arms around him. Kakashi inwardly sighed, but understood Tsunade's need for attention at that point. He kind of felt like the third wheel, too…

Tsunade pulled back, blushing furiously. "Sorry."

Kakashi shook his head. "No, no…it's okay…"

Tsunade smiled and gently toed Asuma. "Um, excuse me, formerly-half-dead?"

Asuma gave her a not-so-half-dead glare, but Tsunade ignored it and continued, "We kind of need to get going so we can plot our revenge?"

Asuma rolled his eyes. "Fine, fine." He gave Kurenai one last kiss, this one a bit more chaste, and stood up. Kurenai stood next to him. "One last thing…" Asuma said slowly. He rooted around in his kunai pouch for his knuckle blades, slid them onto his fingers, and brought up flaming yellow chakra.

"_Flying Swallow!!"_

Tsunade watched, impressed, as Asuma and Katsu proceeded to tear the statue apart, stone being ground into dust and metal being disintegrated. Kakashi offered a lopsided smile.

"Well, at least he's okay…"

Kurenai sighed. "That's Asuma…"

"Hey, is he smoking?"

Kurenai peered at Asuma. Sure enough, she could see the smoldering end of a cigarette poking out of Asuma's mouth.

"Again," Kurenai said dryly. "That's Asuma."

The yellow flashing back and forth finally died down after another fifteen minutes, and Kakashi was stuffing down laughter by the time Asuma was finished. Asuma took the cigarette out of his mouth, knuckle blades still on his hands, and wordlessly flicked the cigarette into a pool of blood on the ground; obviously from where Kurenai had given someone a close shave.

Tsunade grinned.

"Badass!" she called across the room. Asuma offered her a goofy grin.

"At least now you know I'm okay…"

**A/N: They actually cut that from the English anime…where Asuma flicks his cigarette into a pool of blood to put it out. SPOILER ALERT When Asuma save Shikamaru from the Sound ninja following him when Shikamaru is tailing Sasuke and Gaara, he kills all the Sound ninja and puts out his cigarette in a pool of blood…I was so sad when I found out that they cut that from the anime because Asuma is so badass, he needs his bloody cigarettes!! TT Review please?**


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

Asuma sat up slowly, noticing Shizune at his side. Tsunade had insisted on keeping him under her radar for a while, and he didn't like it. At all.

"Asuma?"

"Mm?"

Shizune stared at him. "How often do you smoke?"

Asuma shrugged. "Not much…I can get a pretty good drag off one that's a day old, sometimes."

Shizune sighed. "Please stop smoking."

Asuma shrugged. "Why should I?"

"Because your lungs are deteriorating."

Asuma shrugged again. "Can we talk about something else?"

Shizune sighed, even more heavily than she looked. "Asuma, I wish you would take some things more seriously."

"Yeah, yeah. So do I."

"Asuma!!"

Asuma waited for Kurenai; sure enough, it was only a matter of seconds before she tackled him backwards, and Asuma laughed. "Hyper much?"

"Just happy to see you."

Shizune smiled and stepped back. "Well, I'll leave you two to catch up."

Kurenai nodded, and Shizune walked out, softly closing the door behind her.

"Well?"

Kurenai shook her head. "No word yet. Akatsuki seems to be very good at hiding…"

Asuma nodded. "Well, they are the most dangerous ninja in the known world…"

Kurenai sighed. "They're retards," she spat. "I can't believe-!"

"I can, so calm down."

Kurenai took a deep breath, and Asuma set his hands on her shoulders. "That's better. You need to blow off a little steam."

"I know."

Asuma reached up and gave Kurenai a gentle kiss, trying to bring her temperature down to sub-normal level. "Come on, you're hot when you're angry, but you can't burn down the building."

Kurenai laughed and relaxed a bit. "True. And I'm lucky it's you, otherwise the entire _country _would be on fire."

Asuma nodded. "So, get me a map and I'll show you one guess of the Akatsuki's whereabouts."

OOOOOOOOO

Kakashi collapsed for the second time today.

Tsunade glared down at him, looking exasperated with him.

"I told you so."

Kakashi knelt at Tsunade's feet, clutching at his bleeding side and struggling to breath. Tsunade sighed, leaned over, and picked him up. "You overexerted yourself _again, _and _now _look what you've done to yourself."

Kakashi simply waited while Tsunade helped him stand and tried to walk, nearly unsuccessfully. Shizune came out of Asuma's room just as Tsunade walked past with Kakashi. The injured jounin watched as Shizune's eyes widen, and then she sighed with annoyance.

"You brat, you shouldn't have gone after them," she scolded. "Oh, well. Tsunade-sama, just get him off his feet and I'll take care of him."

"Don't kill me."

Tsunade sighed and focused chakra to her arms, then picked up Kakashi and carried him, laid out across her arms, to a room. She set him down in a bed and looked to her left. Sure enough, Shizune was there, immediately trying to close the wound in Kakashi's side.

"You wanna tell me what happened?"

"Not really," Kakashi grunted, "Given that I can't breath."

"You punctured a lung, broke three ribs, and ripped your side apart. _What happened?"_

"Can't breathe…!" Kakashi reminded her. Shizune sighed and began moving around even faster.

"I'm trying, believe me."

Kakashi didn't seem convinced.

Shizune pulled his shirt off, revealing a long gash across the skin of Kakashi's left side. Tsunade moved around Shizune to Kakashi's head and began absently stroking his spiky silver hair. Kakashi drew another labored breath, and Tsunade reached forward, searching for his pulse. "Shizune…dangerously low…"

Shizune nodded. "Get him oxygen, I'm working on this."

Tsunade settled an oxygen mask over Kakashi's face, praying her could make it. Shizune was working fast, but the wound was deep and…

Tsunade reached forward, green chakra glowing around her hands. She set her hands next Shizune's, trying to heal Kakashi even faster. But it still wasn't enough; Kakashi was coughing out blood, and Tsunade wasn't even sure she could heal him fast enough. Green chakra was being poured into Kakashi's body, but Tsunade could tell he was barely hanging on.

"I never should have let him take that mission," she mumbled. "It was too soon…I never should have let him…"

"Don't cry over spilled milk," Shizune said quickly. "Focus on healing him!"

Tsunade wasn't sure what she should do anymore. This was insanity-and Kakashi wasn't-

"There!"

Shizune seemed to have found the light at the end of the tunnel-she was pouring even more chakra into Kakashi then ever before. Tsunade began healing the middle layer of muscle, trying to close up the wound faster.

"…Okay, that one hurt."

Tsunade breathed a sigh of relief. Kakashi was back, and if he could mouth off that much, he was fine.

"You constantly get yourself into trouble," Tsunade scolded. "If you don't start being more careful, I'm going to lose you one of these days."

Kakashi mumbled something violent under his breath, causing Tsunade to wonder if he was still sane, and then reached inside his jounin vest and produced a small scroll.

"Mission successful."

Tsunade smiled. "Thank you. But next time, try to get out _before _the enemy ninja tries to skewer you."

Kakashi sighed. "Be happy. I saved the scroll, didn't I?"

"I want your life more."

Kakashi made a face, but gave no biting remark back. He probably couldn't come up with anything caustic enough that wouldn't qualify as "hurting a girl."

Tsunade grinned. "Little brat."

Kakashi saw it coming all the way down Main Street; but he didn't exactly want to avoid it. Tsunade wasn't that bad…was she?

When Tsunade's lips brushed his own, Kakashi swore he passed out.

_Epilogue _

Tsunade confessed to having a crush on Kakashi that same hour, and Kakashi took pity on her and asked her out. They ended up with two children, a girl named Michiko and a boy named Ichigo, and Tsunade stepped back from Hokage to take care of them. Kakashi took over for her, and he stayed until he reached sixty. When he finally started to slow down, he allowed Naruto to take over. Naruto, as the Hokage, reminded Kakashi constantly of Yondaime, his lost sensei.

Kurenai _did _get pregnant, and Asuma was the father. They only had one child, a girl named Sora. She grew up to be a shinobi under Naruto and she eventually became the next Hokage. Asuma wasted no time in eliminating the Akatsuki. The Swallow was more than happy to help him, and Katsu agreed to partner with Sora when Asuma died. When Sora became Hokage, the first thing she did was go to the memorial stone outside the tower and pray that her father was proud of her.

**A/N: Well, that's that. I ran out of inspiration, and this seemed like a good place to end it anyway. Wow, all of my fics seem to end the same way… . I'm a really boring person, aren't I? Well, I'll do something interesting over summer vacation, I guess…well, review please, I guess.**


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